tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-39519818339819206462024-03-06T02:54:56.975+01:00My random thoughts ...I am gawi, also known as tepilawen to some. A female sub from Norway.
In this blog I will share my experiences, my thoughts and my fantasies with you.
Hope you will join me in my journey!Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger34125truetag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-47734853463111587482013-06-02T18:15:00.000+02:002013-06-02T18:15:12.207+02:00The X-files, part 7<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4Vdpyf1oESBQuDzqp6FIT-AJRrWg4NZkXgAwVMg57OvBVjWvU7s9Y1bp8HtBr7TV-GpWOXzj1yxrLaPM3i6udEFk28vQiLIauGekOU4xqJonNuZz9Mr-vYagtJVK1LEx7u1idmgZu-MA/s1600/xfiles.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4Vdpyf1oESBQuDzqp6FIT-AJRrWg4NZkXgAwVMg57OvBVjWvU7s9Y1bp8HtBr7TV-GpWOXzj1yxrLaPM3i6udEFk28vQiLIauGekOU4xqJonNuZz9Mr-vYagtJVK1LEx7u1idmgZu-MA/s200/xfiles.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
<i>Ahhhh, the fond memories of the first time I spaced out because of sex ...</i><br />
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<i style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;"><span style="color: #333333;">As usual there's a huge tmi'alert for those of you who doesn't want to know about the intimate parts of my sexlife ;) ... </span></i></div>
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<h2>
Fucked into subspace</h2>
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<span id="docs-internal-guid-2134e15c-05a1-995b-15d7-7ef9b63efe71"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">- Ride me, he said</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It was the end of a wonderful evening. We had gotten an unexpected opportunity to spend the night together, and didn't hesitate to take it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I took his cock out of my mouth and eagerly led it into my pussy instead. I let out a moan as he entered me. It felt so good to have him inside me. To watch him smile at me, to see him enjoy himself as I moved my body on top of him.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I love that. Watching him when we have sex. He's so relaxed when it comes to that. No posing, no showing off. Not hiding what he feels. So when I'm with him I don't close my eyes as much as I've done with my previous lovers. I watch him, I smile back when he smiles at me. But, most of all I enjoy the experience.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">- May I come? I moaned.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">- Not yet, he whispered ...</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So I waited, fought back the orgasm. Kept it leashed, right there on the brink of ecstasy until I was allowed to come.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">- Come! Come for me my whore!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And I came. I came so strong! Had anyone else called me a whore I'd probably slap them. But when He calls me that it's just a huge turn-on. So he whispered words to me. Called me his whore, his dirty slut, his fuck toy. His to do with as he pleases. His to lend out to his friends, to show off, to fuck, whip or lash. I answered him back. Told him he owns me, controls me. That I enjoy being those things for him, that I turn myself over to him.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Instead of appalling me, it turned me on.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I got the permission to come as much as I wanted. And so I did. There wasn't even any point in counting the times I came. After a while one orgasm just rolled over into the next. I barely managed to breathe between orgasms. Sometimes he took control. Held me and thrust his cock into me. Or just moved, gently but firmly. When he did my orgasms became stronger. Somehow I felt him MORE when he did that.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">After a while I got tired, but I didn't stop. He hadn't told me to stop. So I continued. I continued until his face became blurry. Until my breath came in heavy gasps, my hair hung in front of my face and I started losing my balance. So he held me. He held my arms behind my back and fucked me whilst I was hanging limply on top of him.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Somewhere in this time something happened in my head. I was no longer ME, no longer an independent woman having sex with her lover. I was HIS. His whore, his slut, his fuck toy. It didn't matter that I was tired. Stopping or asking to stop wasn't something that occurred to me, it wasn't even an option. I was there for HIS pleasure. And he'd given me an order. An order I'd follow until he told me to stop. Or, until I passed out. Whichever came first.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">After a while he turned me over on my back and kept on fucking me. Whenever I managed to keep my eyes open his face was there. Blurry, but it was there. So I smiled, or tried to. He talked to me. Asked me if I was OK, if I was in subspace. I tried to answer, but was only able to make unintelligible sounds. My body wouldn't listen and I wasn't able to keep my eyes focused, or even open.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">That's when I knew I was in subspace.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">When my body won't obey. When my eyes go unfocused and start fluttering. My eyes "roll back into my head" and no matter how hard I try I can't take back control. I can't even let him know that I'm spacing out, so I just have to trust that he reads me well enough to see it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">That's when I know I'm in subspace. When I'm there all I feel, all that registers is what happens to my body. Not even that registers fully. Most of the time I barely notice pain, unless it's very strong. Pleasure on the other hand registers. More so than usual. Actually pleasure is often all that exists when I go far enough in.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It must be hard for him to know though. What's going on. I think I'm very still? Motionless even? I've told him he can still use me as he wants. Fuck me, hit me, snuggle. Just, not leave me. I need someone close to me when I'm there. Actually, I need Him there. He's my safety line. My anchor in the world of reality. He's what I need to feel safe enough to let go. The further in I go. The closer I need him to be.</span></div>
<br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So he fucked me some more. Then he fingered me. My orgasms started getting weaker. Not because it stopped feeling good. But because my body got so tired that it didn't manage to produce them anymore. I was still drifting in a world of bliss.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">After a while I started registering things again. He was sitting between my legs. Patiently fingering me whilst texting on his phone. I managed to focus my eyes. To move my hand onto his. He stopped and smiled at me.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">- Welcome back!</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I managed a weak smile</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He sat himself up against the pillows, and I started crawling into his arms when he told me to crawl under the covers. I wasn't sure how I'd be able to find the strength to give him a proper blow job. But as before, I'd try. Or pass out ... whichever came first ...</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">However. He told me to just rest there, my head on his belly and his cock in my mouth. So I crawled down. Found a comfortable position and put his cock in my mouth. He texted with someone on his phone.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I felt safe, comfortable, warm, cared for, grateful. So I drifted back into subspace, and into sleep, and back again. I don't know how long I laid there, but it didn't matter to me. I had no desire to move, to take his cock out of my mouth or to speak. I just enjoyed my blissful moment.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">After a while I "woke up" and was allowed to crawl up from under the covers. I thanked him, and we went to sleep.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I've never been fucked into subspace before. I didn't even think it was possible. But he's done it again after that. And I know it won't be the last time this happens.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I just hope it feels as great for him as it does for me.</span></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-7440844699684646102013-05-29T16:37:00.005+02:002013-05-29T16:40:45.763+02:00The X-files, part 5<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4Vdpyf1oESBQuDzqp6FIT-AJRrWg4NZkXgAwVMg57OvBVjWvU7s9Y1bp8HtBr7TV-GpWOXzj1yxrLaPM3i6udEFk28vQiLIauGekOU4xqJonNuZz9Mr-vYagtJVK1LEx7u1idmgZu-MA/s1600/xfiles.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4Vdpyf1oESBQuDzqp6FIT-AJRrWg4NZkXgAwVMg57OvBVjWvU7s9Y1bp8HtBr7TV-GpWOXzj1yxrLaPM3i6udEFk28vQiLIauGekOU4xqJonNuZz9Mr-vYagtJVK1LEx7u1idmgZu-MA/s200/xfiles.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
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<i>As usual, there's a tmi-alert for those of my friends who doesnt want to know intimate details about me ;)</i></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzNdpICrndwTexI1fSDd27dckXlbo1hKXJcecKWKC7832o2uzEFwAGosxRpL2afqgBL-ukb6SzbPh5enXONN1vjb3vRiGDyAfPEybthjcUhN5nA5IU3j4X2NTJgqaD3WAtoFWPD0InujY/s1600/tumblr_lbpc67GqwV1qalt7yo1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzNdpICrndwTexI1fSDd27dckXlbo1hKXJcecKWKC7832o2uzEFwAGosxRpL2afqgBL-ukb6SzbPh5enXONN1vjb3vRiGDyAfPEybthjcUhN5nA5IU3j4X2NTJgqaD3WAtoFWPD0InujY/s320/tumblr_lbpc67GqwV1qalt7yo1_500.jpg" width="279" /></a></div>
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<h2>
Breakfast with a twist</h2>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So it was morning. Coffee was ready in time, baguettes were in the oven and the table was set for breakfast. In spite of the cold weather outside it was nice and warm in the kitchen. Which was good for me since I was dressed as I usually was when Master was at my place. Skimpy dress and nothing else.</span></div>
<b id="docs-internal-guid-1c4d262d-f0b7-5bf9-2510-97679e6784e9" style="font-weight: normal;"><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Ding! Baguettes we're done and I placed them on the table. Master came with his coffee cup and sat down. I was getting ready to join Master for breakfast when he told me to suck his cock. I looked at him. He was already sitting at the table, so the only way to obey his order was by crawling underneath it. So I did ...</span></div>
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<a name='more'></a><b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It was tight under there. My first thought was that I needed a higher table if I was going to do this often.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He pulled his cock out of his pants. It was hard, hungry for my lips to embrace it. I crawled over to him, could feel my mouth salivating by the mere thought of giving him a blow job. Here, under the table in my own kitchen.</span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I had to crawl even further to get close enough. Feeling the cold floor against my knees. A crumb got stuck under my hand. I inched closer. It was a tight fit under there, and at first I didn't think it would work. I wasn't willing to give up quickly though. I tilted my head a bit, and found a position where I could get his cock in my mouth.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He was already hard. He was smooth, hard and tasted of me. I had to smile as I remembered the hot sex we had not long ago. I let out a content sigh as I took him into my mouth. I just love giving him blowjobs!</span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b>
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<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">After some testing I found out that moving my head up and down was near to impossible. Swaying my body gently back and fro worked well though. So I just closed my eyes and enjoyed it. His cock slid in and out of my mouth as I was swaying. I could feel my skirt slide up. The slight difference in temperature when skin was left bare made me very aware of my bum and pussy. Made my skin tingle and it was if I could feel every inch of newly exposed skin. Without thinking I spread my legs a little. Like there was someone behind me. Watching.</span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">There was no rapid breathing, no quick heartbeats. Just a slow, sensual experience. I closed my eyes and every now and then let out a slight moan.</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">After a while he told me to use my hand. Again there was some awkward trying and failing of positions, but I quickly found a position that worked again.</span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I could hear him go about with his breakfast above me. Drinking his coffee and chewing his baguette like there wasn't a sub under the table. Like this was just another morning. Strangely enough that turned me even more on, and pretty soon I was back in my sensual little bubble. Slightly moaning as his cock moved in and out of my mouth.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He told me to finger myself, if I could without it disturbing my job. I moved my feet a bit to get better balance, slid my hand up my leg and just felt wetness .... I was so wet that it had started running down my thighs ... I didn't really play with myself. I just moved my fingers around in that amazing wetness, fascinated by the feel of it.</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Then he told me I could get up. What? Already? It didn't feel like I'd been down there for long, but my baguette had gotten cold ...</span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I'm promised there will be more breakfasts like these. Looking forward to them.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-71521498648773143132013-02-12T18:39:00.000+01:002013-02-12T18:39:03.069+01:00The X-files, Part 4<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4Vdpyf1oESBQuDzqp6FIT-AJRrWg4NZkXgAwVMg57OvBVjWvU7s9Y1bp8HtBr7TV-GpWOXzj1yxrLaPM3i6udEFk28vQiLIauGekOU4xqJonNuZz9Mr-vYagtJVK1LEx7u1idmgZu-MA/s1600/xfiles.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4Vdpyf1oESBQuDzqp6FIT-AJRrWg4NZkXgAwVMg57OvBVjWvU7s9Y1bp8HtBr7TV-GpWOXzj1yxrLaPM3i6udEFk28vQiLIauGekOU4xqJonNuZz9Mr-vYagtJVK1LEx7u1idmgZu-MA/s200/xfiles.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
<br />
When I reread this I felt almost as nervous as when it happened. Do I regret it? No. Will I ever do it again? Don't know really. Right now it doesn't feel that way, but things change<br />
<br />
<i>TMI alert for my friends</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5Evg1RGAJb71QEBuWEKIkVsh1e9A7OBKGJerZVVBwwZgMEoTOUM-oRNNu6Cs36gWs-JNSXBqeo1sSCnp7j97FpLIP6ng9NCH_vnzJFMCu4O-2o2MFWIxkf8dBjNGUw341443GcjPVXCc/s1600/tumblr_lg637i5NRb1qbk26xo1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5Evg1RGAJb71QEBuWEKIkVsh1e9A7OBKGJerZVVBwwZgMEoTOUM-oRNNu6Cs36gWs-JNSXBqeo1sSCnp7j97FpLIP6ng9NCH_vnzJFMCu4O-2o2MFWIxkf8dBjNGUw341443GcjPVXCc/s320/tumblr_lg637i5NRb1qbk26xo1_500.jpg" width="264" /></a></div>
<h2>
<i><br /></i></h2>
<h2>
<i>So, I did it. He shared me</i></h2>
<div>
<i><br /></i></div>
<div>
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.031220266362652183" style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I did it! I followed Sir’s wishes and he shared me with one of his friends. There's no regret. No shame. None of those feelings of bad morals that I'm supposed to have. Just pride and gratitude to Sir for allowing me to have this experience. For guiding me through it.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I was wide awake the moment the alarm clock went off. This was the day. The day he would share me with his friends for the first time. I felt the nervousness in my body, that little knot of anxious anticipation in my chest.<a name='more'></a></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I took a deep breath and got into the shower. Soon my bags were packed and the dogs had gotten their walk. I actually managed to remember all the things I didn't need ... and forget what I needed! I mean ... panties? Come on! I'm not even allowed to wear them around Sir! So why bring them? Shampoo, conditioner and soap though ... that my friends, would have been a better idea.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So! What do you bring to something like this? No panties that's for sure. A brush is good. That hair is probably gonna be really messed up. Shampoo and conditioner ... semen in the hair? That may have worked for Mary ... but not for most other girls. Soap! You don't want to go around smelling of Axe or some other manly scent. Makeup-remover pads ... Your makeup WILL be smeared, so better bring a rescue kit for the face as well.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Condoms? Don't you think the lucky friend should bring that? Bring one just in case. With taste! After all ... you're gonna suck on it for a while, doesn't hurt if it tastes good.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Under my jeans I had on stockings and no panties. The same stockings that I wore for my first 24 hours with Sir. After being washed and dried they still fit just as well! From now on it's my favourite brand I think. They had a few holes from the velcro on the cuffs I wore. But I really don't think Sir or his friend would mind, or even notice. Deciding what to wear wasn't easy. Slutty is good, but I wanted to feel a bit comfortable in it as well. The choice fell on that little black number every woman should have hidden away somewhere. A bit too short for family parties, but not so short that I'd be arrested if I wore it to a club.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He was awake when I came. Eating breakfast, the scene was so ordinary, so safe that I started relaxing again. My nervousness was almost gone, and when we started kissing it dissipated completely.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He made me kneel where I'd be servicing his friend a few hours later. I gave him a quick blow job. I held my hands behind my back, to see how it felt to do it that way. I closed my eyes, felt the carpet below my knees, the warm air in the apartment caressing my skin. It wasn't as awkward as I feared it would be. I could do this! Really I could! I had to smile a little when the image of "The Little Train that Could" snuck into my head.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">However, we weren't about to spend more time in the living room when there was a nice and cosy bed in the next room.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">His bed was soft and warm. We snuck under the covers. Lips were meeting lips, his hands were all over me, my hands all over him. I enjoyed the feeling of him under my hands. Smooth skin, coarse hair, firm muscles. I could feel the muscles in his butt and thighs working as he fucked me. Tried not to dig my nails into his back every time I orgasmed.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">When we got tired we slept. We woke up horny and didn't hesitate to make out. Which led to ... you guessed it! More sex!</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He decided that both we and the dog needed a walk, so we put on our clothes and went outside. The cool air felt good. It cleared my head and it felt good to stretch my legs.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">When we got back to the apartment he decided he needed a shower, I was a bit unsure what to do. Should I stay? Should I go into the living room and relax? I decided to stay and enjoy the show. I watched him in the mirror while he showered, grinning to myself as I got an excellent view of his body. Watching the running water, him soaping himself in suddenly made me feel sweaty and smelly. So, when he got out I asked if I could have a shower as well.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">- No time for that I'm afraid</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">- Oh? You've made the call?</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">- Yup!</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He grinned and I felt all my nervousness and then some rush back into me.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">- Oh crap! We're actually doing this!</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">That's when it felt real for the first time. You know when someone get shocking news and their face goes white, then red, then white </span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">again? I'm sure that my face went through all those stages.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">- Don't worry, you'll do great!</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">If I smiled it must have been the shakiest smile ever. I already had my little dress on, and nothing else but the stockings.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Pretty soon I found myself back bound, blindfolded, plugs in my ears. Sir guided me over to him, made me kneel before him. Not being able to see, and also with my hearing reduced I suddenly felt kinda wobbly. I got a test run on giving a blow job in this position as Sir rarely wastes a chance to have me wrap my lips around his cock.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">My legs soon started hurting. I really don't have that kneeling slave position down yet, so I have to work on that I think. I was allowed to sit on the couch while I was waiting. As I sat there I tried not to slouch. It's nothing I've been told to avoid, but personally I find slouching unattractive.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Sitting there with Sir. His hands on me, him kissing me I started to relax again. He started playing with my breasts, and as I felt that familiar tingling start in my nipples he pulled both my breasts out from my dress. Left them there. And here I thought picking a dress instead of a top would leave my breasts covered! My tops have a habit of winding up in a heap on the floor ...</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">When Sirs friend came I felt kind of relaxed at first. Ready. Waiting.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">They started talking, his friend came over to me and all of the sudden I was nervous again. My heart was beating hard in my chest, my breathing quickened and I had to focus on breathing normally.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">They were talking about me like I wasn't there. Or, like I didn't matter. I was so nervous that I wasn't able to concentrate. And, since I had plugs in my ears I didn't really hear them anyway. So I continued to focus on my breathing. The nervousness in my body. The increasing wetness between my legs.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">There was no desire to back out. I wanted to do this. For myself, for Sir.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Then his friend spoke to me. It didn't register at first ... Since I was unable to make out anything else than a few scattered words, and also since I felt I had no right to listen in on</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">their conversation, I had stopped listening a while ago.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">-Are you talking to me? Sorry, I can't really hear you.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So he talked with me. Asked questions, made comments. I can't for the life of me remember what he said. By now I was so nervous that I was shaking. It annoyed me. That my nervousness got in the way for this.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Then Sir started playing with my breast. His friend joined in. I had no trouble telling who was who. His friends hands were cold after being outside. The combination of having two sets of hands touching me, of having warm and cold mixed together, made me so horny that it was impossible to be nervous anymore.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Sir showed off his party trick. Making me come by pinching my nipples. Those orgasms aren't like my ordinary ones. They're focused mostly in my upper body, making me cramp up. Feels great though. His friend seemed to like that, and tried it out several times during his visit. They both talked about how I would react if a bunch of men suddenly came and pinched my nipples when we were out having dinner or something. I blushed and hoped that would never happen.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Sir stayed to watch. I was grateful for that. It felt safer with him being there. Not that I was afraid anything bad would happen if he left. It was just that nervousness of mine that still bothered me a bit.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It was time for me to perform my duties. I kneeled between the feet of Sirs friend. He pushed my head between his legs, his pants still on. I understood that I was supposed to caress his cock with my head against his jeans. Did my best, but wasn't sure whether or not I did a good job. I could feel the coarse fabric against my cheek, the warmth of his body and his hardening cock. I could tell he was making comments about my performance, but couldn't really hear what they talked about through the earplugs.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Then he took off his pants. Sooo glad I wasn't nervous anymore! Not much anyway. It was sort of too late to back out now, so I just focused on the task at hand. Or, in this case mouth ... since my hands we're back bound.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He was bigger than I expected. Darn! I'm not any good with big cocks. My mouth and throat just seem too small, and I can't take them all the way in. I was certain there would be a lot of teeth, but I tried wrapping my lips around them, so that wouldn't happen.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So I sucked his cock. For a looong time. Trying out different techniques to see what he liked best. I got a couple of face slaps for teeth-action. He didn't hit hard, but I got the point, apologized and tried to do better. I tried not to smile when he slapped me. I kinda enjoy face slaps, they tend to turn me on.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I got a lot of comments about not doing it right. Or well enough. Maybe I should have gotten upset about that? Instead I got annoyed with myself and tried harder. Got tired after a while though, so I slowed down or relaxed my mouth a bit now and then without realizing it. A quick comment every time that happened soon fixed that though.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I had to take a lot of breaks because my feet cramped up. Too many breaks if you ask me. Standing up straight to relieve them a bit. During one of these breaks Sirs friend started fingering me, massaging my g-spot. I could tell I was about to squirt, but could feel myself holding back against my will. Afraid to make a mess on Sirs carpet. They made me lie down, and the friend fingered me some more. They discussed the technique, asking me questions I think? Combined with Sirs hands on me I hardly knew where I was. My brain always gets a bit muddy when I get horny. But, having two sets on hands on me really just shut the logical part of my brain off. I only remember how good it felt. How I hardly noticed what they were saying. But, still I just couldn't relax enough to squirt even if I wanted too. Too soon they decided I had gotten enough pleasure for the moment.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I went back to the task given to me. Doing my best to make him come. It took his while though. I soon found out why! He told me he was enough of a sadist to hold back until he knew I'd get punished for not doing my job well enough. I almost had to giggle as I sat there. Typical Dominants!</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I had a really hard time taking all of him in my mouth. It wasn't only his size, but also something about the angle. I've had problems with that before. Cocks that aren't necessarily big, but the angle is "wrong". That makes it near impossible to get them all the way in. If they keep hitting your palate it doesn't really matter if you would be able to relax your throat enough to take them all the way in. However, it's amazing what you can do when you get a helping hand! He shoved my head down and finally I felt my throat open and he slid all the way in. There's something about that feeling. When you feel him all the way down in your throat. I used to hate it, but now that I've learned to relax I kinda enjoy it.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I finally got to use my hands. Clearly he wasn't satisfied with me. So he kept correcting me. Again, I kept trying to do better. I didn't squeeze hard enough with my hands around his cock? What? I was almost afraid I'd hurt him! Well, at least now I know. Should this scenario happen again at a later time. After all ... Sir does enjoy sharing his toys …</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Later it dawned on me that at least some of the correcting and criticism was part of that whole humiliation thing? So I don't really know how much of it was "real".</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Finally he came. I was kneeling in front of him while he stood on the floor. Unfortunately I was having a slight cold, so my lung capacity wasn't at it's best. Since he was face fucking me at the time I ran out of air just as he came. No time to get that much needed gulp of air. I gagged, gasped for air. It was a complete mess. Disgusting, embarrassing, disappointing. He complained a bit about that, and I can't blame him.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But, finally I could lean back. Lick the semen from my lips and know I had completed the task given to me.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I got to sit on the couch again. Sirs friend left and thanked him for the blow job. I thought he was talking to me. My ear plugs had fallen out without me noticing it, so all of the sudden I could hear what was going on. He wasn't talking to me though. Blush. Embarrassing. Think I have to get used to that feeling.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Why do I like that feeling of embarrassment? Well, kinda like anyway. I don't really know. When and if I do find out I'll get back to you!</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Sir came back. Took off my blindfold. As my vision cleared I saw him smiling. He was proud of me! I was happy and content. I was grateful to him for giving me this opportunity, this gift. And a bit proud of myself as well, having dared to go through with this.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I know he will share me again. And I suspect he won't wait long. Hope I'm not as nervous next time! ;)</span></span><br /><span style="font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-71939113092886518232013-02-07T18:43:00.000+01:002013-02-07T18:43:13.297+01:00The X-files, Part 3<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4Vdpyf1oESBQuDzqp6FIT-AJRrWg4NZkXgAwVMg57OvBVjWvU7s9Y1bp8HtBr7TV-GpWOXzj1yxrLaPM3i6udEFk28vQiLIauGekOU4xqJonNuZz9Mr-vYagtJVK1LEx7u1idmgZu-MA/s1600/xfiles.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4Vdpyf1oESBQuDzqp6FIT-AJRrWg4NZkXgAwVMg57OvBVjWvU7s9Y1bp8HtBr7TV-GpWOXzj1yxrLaPM3i6udEFk28vQiLIauGekOU4xqJonNuZz9Mr-vYagtJVK1LEx7u1idmgZu-MA/s200/xfiles.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
<br />
Originally I posted this pretty late in the series, but this time I've chosen to put it where it should have been posted in the first place. Fond memories of a few stolen hours.<br />
<br />
<i>As per usual I send a huge TMI-alert to those of my friends who would prefer not to know explicit details about my sex life.</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhc6lrDw9o88zEdnit_Nbzt_yF8rixEU0P785hMA96LA8cz3RLBWpE-lu1GCDTCfwHNMpgbUkDHwLDJrWc2tesKH_bS23nACA3WwF2Q5kPEUpXKY88rVS255miXPjK8VKXTO9xNF4VEwSA/s1600/tumblr_lk9qz6EwvG1qhyy0no1_500_large.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="218" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhc6lrDw9o88zEdnit_Nbzt_yF8rixEU0P785hMA96LA8cz3RLBWpE-lu1GCDTCfwHNMpgbUkDHwLDJrWc2tesKH_bS23nACA3WwF2Q5kPEUpXKY88rVS255miXPjK8VKXTO9xNF4VEwSA/s320/tumblr_lk9qz6EwvG1qhyy0no1_500_large.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<h2>
<i>Booty call 1</i></h2>
<div>
<i><br /></i></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.8961390673648566" style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So, I had a few hours to spend between dropping off one kid and picking up another. An offer to visit Sir was greatly appreciated. It had been planned for a few days, and if everything was on schedule we'd have three wonderful hours.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Of course nothing was on schedule. One tiny delay followed the other, and before I knew it I was delayed by one hour. Fortunately it worked out, so that we still had our three hours.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I was so nervous when I got closer to where he lived! It was only the second time we met for play, and I was late! Would I get punished for that? I imagined myself getting one lash of the belt for each minute I was late. Like I did when I forgot to put on the coffee.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><a name='more'></a><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I found the right apartment building where he met me in the hallway. Smiling. We kissed, and as expected my knees turned to jelly in about 10 seconds. He took me by the hand and led me to his apartment. I felt kind of shy, being led gently by the hand like that.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Upstairs we immediately started making out. We eventually moved into the living room, and he showed where I'd kneel. The next day, when I would be giving his friend a blowjob. I blushed and stuttered. It was still a bit scary to think about it, but I looked forward to it as well. In that dread filled anticipations kinda way ...</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He made me kneel before him. In that very spot. As we made out, as I sucked his cock, I tried to imagine how I'd feel the next day. Hands tied behind my back, blindfolded, doing his bidding.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> </span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">We moved into the bed. Making out, having sex, snuggling. It was just as great as last time. That's always a big question the second time I have sex with a man. Will it be just as good as the first time? Or was it only good because of the thrill of first-time-sex?</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">There wasn't much play. We just enjoyed each other. Almost fell asleep for a bit. My hand in his. I felt happy.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">As we started having sex he held his hand firmly over my mouth. Effectively muffling my moans and screams of joy. He then covered both my nose and my mouth, blocking my air supply. When I needed air I tapped his thigh and he’d let me go.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I don't know what it is about breath control, but I love it.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Later when I sucked his cock he'd push my head down so that I didn't get any air. Again, I tapped his thigh if I needed air.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He facefucked me several times. Hard, brutally. I loved it, I tried to watch my teeth, tried not to gag. Tears were running, I was gagging, and I loved it.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">There's something about deepthroating. When his cock passes that muscle in my throat. It feels strange, good, satisfying.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">When I left my throat was sore. I knew it would be even worse when I went home the next day. And I smiled at the thought.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Then he went down on me, it was my reward for writing my first report. Oh, his tongue! He knows how to use it! Still he said that it can be even better. If we haven't had sex first, when I'm more sensitive. Can't wait!</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Later, when he was fucking me from behind he asked me, did I want him to fuck me in the ass? I knew what he meant straightaway. Knew it would hurt. Still I said yes. He pushed himself into me. Not gently, not slowly. Fast. Hard. I knew it would hurt, but was surprised at how painful it was. I couldn't stop myself from screaming. I screamed my pain into the pillow while he was fucking me.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Telling him to stop, to use the codeword didn't occur to me. This was what I'd asked for, what I'd fantasized about. This was him showing his Dominance over me, showing me that my pleasure is nothing I can take for granted, that I'm his to use as he wishes. This was me submitting totally, accepting that my body doesn't belong to me when I'm with him. That my pain and my pleasure is his to decide over.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It hurt, and he fucked me, and I enjoyed it. Sometimes the pain wasn't too bad. Sometimes it felt good. But mostly it was painful. He wanted it to be that way I think? When it started feeling good he changed his pace or his position, and it would hurt again. (Edit: Turns out he didn't change pace to make the hurt last. He wanted it to turn into pleasure. Oh well, maybe next time?)</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I didn't cry. I thought I would. But I didn't. I screamed though, and whimpered. A lot ...</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Then we made out some more, snuggled. Had great sex. I didn't want to leave. But, eventually the alarm went off and I had to go home. I was told to come and wake him up the next morning. To sneak into his bed. Crawl under his covers and give him a blowjob.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I left smiling. Looking forward to the next day. Trying to decide what to wear. What does one wear for such occasions?</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Now I'm about to go to bed. I thought I'd be nervous about tomorrow. I am, of course. But not as nervous as I thought I'd be. I'm told I might get fucked as well. By him? His friends? Only time will show. Maybe I won't even know? Will I be able to tell his cock from that of his friends?</span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Well, I know what I'll be dreaming of!</span></span></b></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-39984869942317998722013-02-05T20:59:00.000+01:002013-02-05T21:00:29.680+01:00The X-files, Part 2<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4Vdpyf1oESBQuDzqp6FIT-AJRrWg4NZkXgAwVMg57OvBVjWvU7s9Y1bp8HtBr7TV-GpWOXzj1yxrLaPM3i6udEFk28vQiLIauGekOU4xqJonNuZz9Mr-vYagtJVK1LEx7u1idmgZu-MA/s1600/xfiles.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4Vdpyf1oESBQuDzqp6FIT-AJRrWg4NZkXgAwVMg57OvBVjWvU7s9Y1bp8HtBr7TV-GpWOXzj1yxrLaPM3i6udEFk28vQiLIauGekOU4xqJonNuZz9Mr-vYagtJVK1LEx7u1idmgZu-MA/s200/xfiles.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
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I've been putting this off for ages. Reposting these reports that I wrote is a bit scary now that my blog isn't anonymous anymore.<br />
What will people think? Will they judge? Do I really care if they do?<br />
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I don't know if I'll ever do the things I did back then again. A part of me would like to say never. But then again I know that things change when you're in a good D/s-relationship. Things that were scary and unthinkable aren't anymore.<br />
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But for now I'll just settle for the occasional trip down memory lane.<br />
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<i>As in<a href="http://tepilawen.blogspot.no/2012/02/th-e-x-files-part-1.html" target="_blank"> X-files, Part 1</a> I have to warn you about the HUGE TMI-factor(Too Much Information) in this post. There are explicit details about my sexual life. You are hereby warned ;-)</i><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0v_wiHnRfY3txBjntDzRabKvq38n5r2RaoCajvWtludqC5ewWLdmSJhyphenhyphenK0Sbb8Tdl7uiHOJ3R68bsTGYy1cyIxhBfiTJgh2WjCFziw5wPctyKsYzyS_zVo_y8JoIAvo9owHSORVKBOZw/s1600/z214415356.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0v_wiHnRfY3txBjntDzRabKvq38n5r2RaoCajvWtludqC5ewWLdmSJhyphenhyphenK0Sbb8Tdl7uiHOJ3R68bsTGYy1cyIxhBfiTJgh2WjCFziw5wPctyKsYzyS_zVo_y8JoIAvo9owHSORVKBOZw/s320/z214415356.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.6417978231329471" style="font-size: medium;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So, He wants to share me</span></b></h2>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.6417978231329471" style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He wants to tie my arms behind my back, make me kneel on the floor and make me give blow jobs to his friends. He wants to fuck me from behind while I suck his friends cock. Eventually he wants his friends to use me any way that they please as long as it doesn't break any of my red limits. Sometimes he'll participate, sometimes he'll just watch, and sometimes I'll be on my own with just the orders I've been given.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Ok, this is where you stop being angry at my behalf. It was actually my idea. I've dreamt about this for years. Of being a slave so wholly and fully that he can use me as it pleases in any and all ways. Including letting others use me if he so wishes.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b><br />
<a name='more'></a><b id="internal-source-marker_0.6417978231329471" style="font-weight: normal;"><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I've suggested this to earlier Dom's. They haven't been too fond of the idea. They've promised me that maybe they'll allow someone to join them in play. But not sex.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It's not like I suggested it to him. I think? But we were sharing fantasies and this one popped out. And he loved it! He immediately began to work it over in his head, and shared his own fantasies about it.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It's not that I want to have sex with lots of guys. If that was the case I could just stay unattached and fuck whomever I pleased. No, it's that exchange of power. Giving my body for his pleasure. Totally. Fully.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Knowing that he gets a kick out of seeing me being used in this manner. Knowing that he'll be proud of me. Respect me. Not in spite of what I've done. But because of it.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And it's that humiliation thing. Being used for this. Being his little slut of a slave. Being his whore. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And it's taboo! It's one of those things that even fellow kinksters may frown upon. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The fact that I won't have a choice also turns me on. That I'll be tied up and blindfolded. Having the cocks of strangers stuffed into my mouth. Being told that I'd better do a good job or I'll be punished.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But, of course I'll have a choice. Nothing is set yet. I still have the chance to change my mind. If we go so far as doing this. And this stranger is standing there, his cock ready to fill my mouth. And it just gets too ... scary, too much. Then I can say my codeword. He'll accept that. His friend will accept that. There won't be any consequences and he won't be disappointed in me. I hope it doesn't come to that though.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Do I have reservations? Of course I do! It's scary as shit! But still, I get incredibly wet at the mere thought. My main turn-on is not servicing his friends. It's him watching. Him giving me away.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">What are my worries?</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">My worries are that they'll talk. That one day someone will tell someone, and my friends or family will find out. Telling them that I'm a kinkster is one thing. But this, being shared, it's so taboo that few people will understand. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">My worries are that one of his friends is one of those very few people I really, really dislike. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">My worries are that one of them will have an STD. Condoms are a must of course, but accidents can, and do on occasion, happen.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">My worries are that his friends won't understand. They'll enjoy it. I'm sure of it. But the world is full of double standards. And according to them those guys are the coolest ever! While I'm the whore. The slut. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Being seen as those things in my everyday vanilla life is something different altogether. I'm a mom, a daughter, a friend, a sister, an ex wife, an ex girlfriend. The people around me wouldn't understand. They'd be confused, worried, angry, hurt.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Those are my worries. Those are the things that may make me stop this before it even happens.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Saturday is the day. The day of me being shared for the first time. He's asked me several times if I really want to do this. Told me that I can back out any time I want. It's good to know that.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He's also told me that he looks forward to this. So do I. I do! Really I do! It's just that it's a bit scary ...</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">3 days left. Counting down ...</span></b></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-61976347959414667262013-02-05T20:25:00.001+01:002013-02-05T20:25:36.335+01:00I'm back<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwVdGp-2Pcp9p5ZlIWHYSCwNGR0G1B3Cty_5kU5_0KRsUxUnACmS3PeF8ZHpPDkMUXBQ1r4-BsBGxSNolYvq9bm-trzWwdkbMXZO87vxGSDlrHQzIg9tBmO9Clbb0w40b6LertiK4cJdk/s1600/grief.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="232" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwVdGp-2Pcp9p5ZlIWHYSCwNGR0G1B3Cty_5kU5_0KRsUxUnACmS3PeF8ZHpPDkMUXBQ1r4-BsBGxSNolYvq9bm-trzWwdkbMXZO87vxGSDlrHQzIg9tBmO9Clbb0w40b6LertiK4cJdk/s320/grief.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.9733196704182774" style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Whoah! I haven’t written in here since late June last year! I didn’t realize it was that long ago … </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Well, life was very hard for a while, and everything got put on hold. Remember my post <a href="http://tepilawen.blogspot.no/2012/03/yesterday.html" target="_blank">“Yesterday”</a>? What that doctor told us was that my mom had cancer. So the next months were filled with grief, worrying, exhaustion and just learning how to cope.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">She died in May. Only a few weeks after her birthday.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I’ve only just felt that I’ve started living again. It feels like I’ve only … well, existed the past year.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So it’s time to start trying to be active with my blog again. </span></b>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-24073156350807718742012-06-29T16:12:00.002+02:002012-06-29T16:12:56.797+02:00So, what's this BDSM-thing really?<span id="internal-source-marker_0.6504852725192904"></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhaOsbWWFdNMRGrNdilZpR3QhFVeZWDC0UNOosCozar5hYkbNYiGSwe8Khcg5WcHXk6yjbX6_l-BGoDhDhxzNKMXbUBo5DnCogwSCVEeAaejiL70uddtdlsynFD0E4cqxjJpmsyYu5DuGA/s1600/kinky.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="218" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhaOsbWWFdNMRGrNdilZpR3QhFVeZWDC0UNOosCozar5hYkbNYiGSwe8Khcg5WcHXk6yjbX6_l-BGoDhDhxzNKMXbUBo5DnCogwSCVEeAaejiL70uddtdlsynFD0E4cqxjJpmsyYu5DuGA/s320/kinky.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.6504852725192904" style="background-color: white;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">That's a question I've been thinking about a lot lately. Both because my vanilla friends have been asking me, and because I've started checking out vanilla men. Which just feels rather pointless.</span></b></div>
<span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Well, I know what we DO ofcourse. I know about D/s, bondage, flogging, masochism, consent, fetishes and so on.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But what IS it? Is it just a "hobby"? Is it just something I like? Is it a preference? Or is it something stronger, something more ... basic? Like a basic need for all these things. Something I can't do without, something that I’ll sorely miss if I end up in a vanilla relationship?</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Because let's face it. Finding a kinky boyfriend is hard. Atleast in Norway. Atleast for me it seems.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The English Wikipedia lists BDSM as a sexual preference. While the Norwegian one defines it as an orientation.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Which one should I choose to believe? Or … should I believe any of them? After all, we all know that Wikipedia is an undependable source of information sometimes.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">If it’s a preference then it implies that it’s a voluntary choice. Does it mean that I’ve chosen to be like this? That I simply find vanilla sex to be boring?</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><a name='more'></a><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I spoke with a vanilla friend about this last night. What surprised me, is that he didn’t feel like this was something I’ve chosen. I’ve known this guy for years, and we talk about everything, so there’s not many people who knows as much about my sexlife as he does.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So he knows how I always felt like something was missing during all my earlier relationships. Even when I was superinlove and had a great sexlife I felt that something was somehow “wrong”. Sex was great, but it was still unfulfilling. I can’t tell if something was missing in my relationship aswell. I was unmedicated for my bipolar condition at the time, so my head just wasn’t working the way it should. To be quite honest with you I was quite a whack job at the time. The poor guy should have a medal or something ...</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">My friend knows how hard I’ve tried to like vanilla sex. Experimenting, using different positions, making sure there’s been lots of variation. But it’s always gotten old, fast.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I thought that BDSM was an interesting concept for years before I actually tried it. My ex was, and still is, very vanilla so we never tried much out. When we did, even though it was just a tiny little taste, it was amazing. I managed to enjoy sex in a way I never had. He commented on it ofcourse. But even though he enjoyed my reaction to it, he rarely wanted to try it again. Which was frustrating, to say the least. To him this was a bit of fun, something to do when we had lots of time and felt a little crazy. To me … this felt natural. I felt like I needed it. </span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The past couple of years I’ve been fortunate enough to get to know lots of kinksters. I’ve gotten friends, I’ve felt safe and comfortable enough to play and push limits. And it’s felt like coming home.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Another thing people have mentioned, is that I just don’t seem like the type who’ll be into kink. And by that I don’t think about the fact that I supposedly look like a Sundayschool teacher ... I don’t like extreme things, I’m not an adrenalinjunkie, I don’t like to set myself apart from others. So it’s not like I’ve checked this out because I thought it seemed cool. No, it was actually quite scary and felt a bit shameful.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Ofcourse, my kinky friends know that you can never really tell who’s into kink. But people with no experience and little information tend to stereotype.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So I don’t feel like I have a choice.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">A kinky friend of mine said that she feels that a D/s-relationship has an extra dimension to it. And yes, I think she’s right. When it comes to BDSM there’s a general agreement that good communication is vital. Ofcourse, that is no less true for a “regular” relationship, but it seems like kinksters are often better at it.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Then there’s the little games we play. Like having rules, getting ordered to do stuff, orgasm denial, hidden little remotecontrolled surprises. Not to mention the sessions in themselves. As a masochist I just have to mention flogging, spanking, pinching, getting slapped in the face …</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I mean, come on! How am I supposed to go back to vanilla after experiencing the erotic pleasure in masochism!?</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I also love the D/s-part of BDSM. I love being able to be ME without my partner being annoyed that I’m indecisive or “too servile”. I love being able to feel small and protected. I love it so much that the thought of a relaxed 24/7-relationship is very tempting.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">When I dote around my partner and his guests, making sure they have fresh coffee, getting cold beer from the fridge or making a tasty dinner. It’s not because of my “training” that I do that. I do that because I care about him, because I want to. </span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I was partly raised by my grandma. She would never let us do anything, but set the plates and not even that sometimes. “No, sit down and relax!”, that’s what she told us. We were all quite spoiled, or atleast I was since I seemed to be her favourite. So in part I’m raised like this, and I love it when I get to follow the urge to act like that. </span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">My parents on the other hand raised me to tell my guests to feel at home, if they’re hungry or thirsty they know where to find food, or atleast have the good sense to ask for it.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So I guess my behaviour is a mix of what my parents, and what grandma taught me.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It’s not like I want to go around not having to make any of my own decisions. I pity the man who tries to take over control over how I raise my kids. In the kitchen I’m a control freak, and noone gets to rule over my cooking. </span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It’s the little things I love. The small rules, being able to ask for advice and get it, being told I do a good job with the house every once in a while, getting consequences for breaking rules. And I simply LOVE being able to have the bottom role in the sexlife, knowing that he gets equal pleasure out of being the top.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I’m just rambling I guess. I know I’ll ever go back to vanilla. I won’t even TRY to figure out if this is a preference or an orientation. I don’t have the experience, the knowledge or the education to even consider doing something like that.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I’m just trying to figure out how to explain this to my vanilla friends when they try to hook me up with someone who thinks kinky is leaving the lights on during sex.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><h3>
<span style="font-family: Arial;"><span style="font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">So, what about this?</span></span></h3>
<span><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I love sex, I love how varied it can be if we dare push some boundaries and face some taboos. I love how the human body can turn pain into pleasure.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I love the little powergames and mindgames we play.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Compared to all of this, good old fashioned “vanilla-sex” as we call it, simply becomes boring after a while! </span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And since sex, for me, is such an important part of a relationship. I have no intentions of being bored in bed for the next 20 years. I want to have fun! I want orgasms I can only get through pain and humiliation. I want to enjoy reading a book on the floor by my Masters feet.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So don’t hook me up with men who thinks that side of me is too freaky to even consider trying out. Find me a wonderful dominant, sadistic mind with even more kinky fantasies than me. Someone who’ll love me, respect me, challenge me, push me, reward and punish me.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I am kinky, hear me scream!</span></span>
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-80542862921984710612012-05-27T17:38:00.001+02:002012-05-27T18:33:28.036+02:00Come on, seriously?<span id="internal-source-marker_0.23891352745704353"></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5-I1N2BvryhbdyKi0EmCP9T0GxHsDlGqKaA7YnGCj_foGKyjZxI_VE-DOriitO0p7kQ2MzUVg_NpKfgAFN2c9Pez1aqQFWa2T6hDmgq3YVeig0rObeLqrNPVpDXIGE4d5zgbxFXKsqyY/s1600/aftercare.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5-I1N2BvryhbdyKi0EmCP9T0GxHsDlGqKaA7YnGCj_foGKyjZxI_VE-DOriitO0p7kQ2MzUVg_NpKfgAFN2c9Pez1aqQFWa2T6hDmgq3YVeig0rObeLqrNPVpDXIGE4d5zgbxFXKsqyY/s320/aftercare.jpg" width="263" /></a></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11px; font-style: italic; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.23891352745704353" style="font-weight: normal;"><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11px; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Note: I refer to the sub as “she”, simply because I’m a female sub. That does not mean that I don’t include the male sub into my writings. It just gets tiring writing her/him all the time. I also refer to the Dom as “he”. Simply because I’m straight, and to me my Dom will always be a man. Again, it’s the he/she thing. I’m just too lazy ...</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Every now and then, and far too often, I hear about Dominants who almost run their subs into the ground. Either because they don’t know what they’re doing. Or because they simply don’t care. Leaving a wake of heartbroken subs as they move on. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And then they don’t understand why they get a bad reputation ... </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Ok … gawi’s rule number 1 when it comes to BDSM:</span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.23891352745704353" style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia; font-size: 32px; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Frakkin’ KNOW what you’re doing!!!!</span></b><br />
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.23891352745704353" style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You can’t just grab a whip, start hitting, degrading and using a sub, then leaving her to her own devices. You need to know the risks. You need to know about subspace, about aftercare and you REALLY need to know about sub drop. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You need to know about breathplay, bloodplay and ropeplay. Will your knots tighten too much? Are you aware that you should have a pair of scissors around? And then preferably safety scissors?</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Do you know what to do, and what NOT to do when it comes to breath play?</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Do you know how to treat cuts so they won’t get infected? </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Read, ask online, join forums, talk about these and other things at munches. And yes, I’m gonna say this … Ask your sub. She may actually know something you don’t.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And first and foremost …</span></b><br />
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.23891352745704353" style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia; font-size: 32px; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Remember ...</span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.23891352745704353" style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia; font-size: 32px; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">a sub is a person with feelings</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You can’t ignore that your sub has a sub drop because you just can’t be bothered. When you pick up that whip and start hitting, telling her “You’re mine”, then you also pick up a certain amount of responsibility for that sub.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">If you’re not willing to deal with a sub drop. Then don’t play! It may not happen often, but when it happens it’s a really bad place to be. And most of the time it’s only our Dom who can get us quickly back on our feet again.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Not getting the care she needs during a sub drop can actually be a reason for a sub to leave the BDSM-scene.</span><br /><div dir="ltr">
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia; font-size: 32px; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It’s not all about YOU …</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">No, you’re not a weak Dom if you go down on your sub and give her pleasure.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Yes, you’re actually supposed to ask her what she wants out of your relationship. And then follow up on those things.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Yes, believe it or not, but a D/s-relationship is a two way thing.</span><br /><div dir="ltr">
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia; font-size: 32px; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Communicate!</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Talk with you sub about your sessions. Unless you can read minds of course. Then you don’t have to.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">If you can’t be there in person, then do it over the phone, on msn, skype, pm etc, and so on, and so forth …</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">What are her expectations? What worked? What didn’t work? Can anything be done differently?</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><div dir="ltr">
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia; font-size: 32px; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Sub’s talk!</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Do you honestly believe that when you treat your sub like crap, other subs won’t find out? Come on, the scene isn’t THAT big! At least not here in Norway. We talk, we comfort each other when something is wrong, and we give each other advice.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So one day you may actually start getting the response, “Hey, everybody knows you’re a crappy Dom, so I’m not interested” when you go searching for a new sub.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You may be a nice guy, but when you don’t know what you’re doing people may soon start to believe that you’re an ASSHOLE</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><div dir="ltr">
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia; font-size: 32px; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And lastly, to all us subs …</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">We have a tendency to wind up in a little invisible cage we’ve made for ourselves. He’s the Dom. He’s the Boss, the Master, the Daddy. So we can’t tell him that he’s doing something wrong. Right?</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">WRONG!</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">If you feel something’s wrong, you NEED to tell him. We’re not supposed to just accept that he knows everything. He’s human. And as humans we’re meant to evolve, to develop new skills, to learn. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">If someone feels they don’t need to learn anything more. That they’re perfect …</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">That means they’ve stagnated, they’ve failed.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So maybe he’s a lost case. He’s too stubborn, too stupid, too mule headed, whatever really. Then what do you do?</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Leave him before it’s too late! There are better Dom’s out there. They may be rare and hard to find sometimes. But they’re out there. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So go looking. And never forget that even though you’re the sub. You’re still just as important as the Dom is.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><div dir="ltr">
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia; font-size: 32px; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">End note …</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">As I write this, I realize that I’ve been lucky. I’ve met experienced and caring Dom’s. Two of them stand out, both because they’re the ones I’ve played most with, and because they’re the ones who taught me the most. So I thank them both ...</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Boss, I enjoyed being your “customsub”, it was fun!</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Master, I loved being your slave. You showed me how much trust and pleasure a good D/s-relationship can have.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You’ve both ruined me a bit for further men though. I’ve become picky! </span></b>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-15390546177740662012012-03-06T17:12:00.001+01:002012-03-06T17:12:11.562+01:00Yesterday ..<span id="internal-source-marker_0.22971776174381375"></span><br />
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.22971776174381375"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Yesterday. Was not a good day.</span></b></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It didn’t start off too bad. Just an ordinary morning. But then I went to visit my mom. And that’s when my day turned bad. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">She weighs what … 45 kg now? (99 pounds). She can’t eat, so she gets everything intravenously. She has a lot of pain …</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Then she tells me the doctors wants to have a meeting. With her, and us three daughters. An informational meeting. That can’t be good news … </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">When I got out of the hospital, on my way home, and most of the evening, I cried. For the first time in months I wasn’t able to stop myself.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I know that this, on it’s own, doesn’t belong in this blog. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But here’s the thing …</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">For the first time. For the first time EVER. I felt the need to play even though my feelings were a mess. I pinched my arm, to make the physical pain drive away the emotional. The only thing I could think about was calling my old Master, and ask him if he had the time and opportunity to spend a few hours with me.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">However. I had medication for my daughter with me in my handbag. And family always go first. So I picked myself up as best I could and went home.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">All through the evening though. I thought about playing.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I wrote about this in the post called <a href="http://tepilawen.blogspot.com/2012/02/reluctance.html" target="_blank">“Reluctance”</a>. Maybe my “fear” of play is diminishing? Maybe I’ll be able to play again soon? I feel the urge to do so grow stronger each day. And if I can use play as a way to cope better with all that’s going on in my life, then it certainly must be a good thing</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The meeting is tomorrow. I fear it may be another bad day ...</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-15050615492407286902012-03-01T13:00:00.000+01:002012-03-03T16:32:20.566+01:00Spring and womanly luxury<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.886137212626636"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Have you noticed that spring is in the air? Here in Norway the days are getting longer, and the sun has started melting the snow. Some places you can even see the grass peeking through the snow and in an many gardens the first spring flowers are preparing to push through the cold soil to enjoy the warmth of the sun.</span></b></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Yes, I know spring isn’t really here yet. But some days, when the sun is warm, and the snow is melting it FEELS like spring.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">This time of year I enjoy taking long walks. Noticing the change from day to day. It’s amazing how quickly spring chases winter away when it firsts starts! One day my garden will be quiet, with only the sound of the wind through the branches of my huge tree. The next day I’ll hear birds singing, and the first butterfly is stretching it’s wings.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Just as certain as spring is coming now that it’s March, so is International Womens Day. On this day both women and men all over the world will be marching the streets. Demanding attention for womens rights all over the world. Ofcourse, the fight for womens right is ongoing every day of the year. With brave and strong women who are doing important work.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">During the years many things have been accomplished, so there is cause for celebration aswell.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And what better day to celebrate that you are a woman? Why not pamper yourself a little?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Take the dog for a nice long walk if the weather is nice. Feel the smell of spring and enjoy life. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Don’t do housework, buy takeout and enjoy a good chickflick.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Pampering yourself can also mean buying yourself a little gift. As always, I turn to <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/" target="_blank">Eden Fantasys</a> when I’m looking for something special.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">What about some <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/sexy-lingerie" target="_blank">sexy lingerie</a>? I really shouldn’t have wandered in there when I was doing housework. I ended spending half an hour dreaming over various “outfits” that I’d love to have in my lingerie drawer. </span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXMC0TPBKnQC_Jc9nPeEbJHp1zVoUPPM2KRx-1P5OZ2M6EHVw_wjLWiYSfTK5OPFgbV5YbfhB4KjaKwIiTEoMezkuM6G-6eYXXTtOzxCz6DKi9VLsfd6R6LglhD6wmbDlFEX0lycanRYs/s1600/corset.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXMC0TPBKnQC_Jc9nPeEbJHp1zVoUPPM2KRx-1P5OZ2M6EHVw_wjLWiYSfTK5OPFgbV5YbfhB4KjaKwIiTEoMezkuM6G-6eYXXTtOzxCz6DKi9VLsfd6R6LglhD6wmbDlFEX0lycanRYs/s200/corset.jpg" width="100" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">One item I fell for was this little <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/sexy-lingerie/sexy-bra-and-panties/nightwear-with-collar-and-wrist-cuffs" target="_blank">hot number</a> with some cute cuffs. Ofcourse, those cuffs can’t be used during play, but sometimes it’s just the symbolism you’re going for. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Corsets are a favourite of mine, and <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/sexy-lingerie/corsets-and-bustier/satin-and-lace-corset-with-hook-and-eye-closure" target="_blank">this set</a> would look great with a short skirt at a fetish party.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I’m so fortunate that I own a bath tub. Which ofcourse means that I can enjoy long hot baths whenever I find the time. Adding to the luxury of hot water I love to use some <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/beauty-and-body" target="_blank">bath and body products</a>. Some relaxing <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/beauty-and-body/bath-shower/dona-bath-salts" target="_blank">bath salts</a>, followed by a good <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/beauty-and-body/body-moisturizers/simply-sensual-body-butter" target="_blank">moisturizing cream</a>.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Ofcourse, if I had a partner I’d use some of the more sensual bath items. Since I’m certain that all this pampering would make him want to give me some extra attention. If you know what I mean ;)</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEggapbJgkgPmW54qqidfatAMhHzWJ1yhzUdLU-FUHJ8fZmhNVzAhOPWIqY7wnezZIw4e_vU2w5I1LVXqVp0mE1FE466JWCC82A7j9Lf7l6KbC3shLJ_2bTmAAl92zLpYjO9v5W_NQn77Us/s1600/toy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; display: inline !important; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEggapbJgkgPmW54qqidfatAMhHzWJ1yhzUdLU-FUHJ8fZmhNVzAhOPWIqY7wnezZIw4e_vU2w5I1LVXqVp0mE1FE466JWCC82A7j9Lf7l6KbC3shLJ_2bTmAAl92zLpYjO9v5W_NQn77Us/s200/toy.jpg" width="200" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">However, since I’m single I still have plenty of options. What about this <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/vibrators/discreet-vibrators/couture-collection-discretion" target="_blank">cute little vibrator</a>? It can even be used during your bath! And it fits under your panties aswell … Which would certainly happen if a dominant partner found one of those in my little box of toys.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Also, in March there’s St.Patricks day. We don’t celabrate that day here in Norway, but it sounds like a fun day. I just happen to know that Eden Fantasys will be having some nice promotions around that time, so be sure to check it out! </span>
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<a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/sexy-lingerie/"><img alt="Become a goddess wearing sexy and erotic lingerie from EdenFantasys" border="0" height="300" src="http://cdn1.edenfantasys.com/Images/ef/2_Lingerie-Banner-s55.jpg" title="Become a goddess wearing sexy and erotic lingerie from EdenFantasys" width="200" /></a>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-46605045375086185612012-02-29T20:12:00.000+01:002012-03-06T17:09:17.198+01:00Reluctance<span id="internal-source-marker_0.7600611133966595"></span><br />
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.7600611133966595"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">As many of my friends, and a few more or less disappointed Dom’s, may have noticed. I’m pretty reluctant to get involved in any kind of playsession. Even if it’s just for a laugh.</span></b></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I’ve tried explaining it to a few people, some understood and others probably just thought I’m a bit weird. Which is understandable. I AM weird, a fact I’ve never tried to hide.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So … why?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Well, it’s that thing I told you about in my last post called <a href="http://tepilawen.blogspot.com/2012/02/control.html" target="_blank">“Control”</a>. When I play, I have little or no control. More often than no it doesn’t take long before the rest of the world is a blur, before I get orgasms or slip into subspace. I’ve gotten many comments about it these past two years, and to be quite honest with you …</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It’s really embarrassing!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Also, this makes the thought of playing with or around anyone who’s not aware of it a really scary thing.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I’ve played around others before. Some times it’s been ok, and I’ve been able to maintain a certain level of control. Other times I haven’t … This sometimes lead to comments. Which even though they're said in the best of meaning, makes me feel embarrassed and makes the threshold for playing with or around other people that much higher.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Another thing is how extremely personal play feels to me. I feel like I’m showing parts of myself that I don’t want anyone to see.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But I want to! When I’ve played at parties and it’s worked out ok, I’ve loved it. That little exhibitionist who’s hiding deep inside of me has been allowed out to play, and she loves it!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I see others play while having fun. I hear the stories after playparties. And it’s soooo tempting! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But nowadays even the mere idea of playing in front of others makes me feel panicky. Somehow the idea of going to a party with mostly strangers feels safer than playing at a party with my own group. Shouldn’t it be the other way around?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It’s now gotten to the point where even the idea of playing with someone new is scary …</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Maybe I need help with boosting my courage? Maybe I should just accept the fact that this is the way I am?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Right now even the idea of posting this is scary. So maybe I’ll do it before I change my mind? </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Don’t be surprised if this post is deleted tomorrow ;)</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-75037970516708403552012-02-27T14:34:00.003+01:002012-02-27T19:37:14.175+01:00Control<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.9804659977089614"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I’ve been meaning to write about control for a long time. About my need for it, and my lack thereof. And about the things I long for, but don’t dare try.</span></b></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">If there’s anything in my life I’m least able to maintain, it’s control. In most areas of life that’s not a good thing. I just don’t get around to doing things! Most of the time I have that “I’ll do it right after this” kind of attitude. Which means I’ll probably get stuck on 9gag, msn or Rift until bedtime. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I also don’t get around to eating breakfast. Which means I’ll skip my morningpills. Which are an entire meal in themselves by the way. When you’re bipolar that is most definately not a good thing. Not even if you’re “only” bipolar 2, like me.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Not taking my pills will send me on an emotional rollercoasterride, during which I rarely have any control at all. Fortunately the fact that I’m pretty good at taking my evening pills, a routine I’ve had since I was 3, keeps me from loosing it all together.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">What I end up doing is eat chocolate when I’m supposed to eat food. Which again ofcourse has a bad effect on my weight.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Sometimes, when I’ve had a dominant partner, they’ve taken the bother to give me certain ground rules. As long as they’ve checked up on me every now and then, I’ve been really good at doing as I’m supposed to.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It’s a bit silly isn’t it? That I’m a complete mess on my own. But as soon a a man I care about tells me to follow certain rules I’m the most obedient little sub ever?</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_6ZCFMJv3-LxfDBMJnDhqkK_H5NdfzpsvqXgHz9z6vhQ6rzFQbXOJ6NjZIaUUS3dS8TJ2RFw2MGCFxJycJbHFUFlXt_91s4Es_9XsGyjQziHp_wPTQbHFLnmA0IdnCHHrTYifK3Zmybw/s1600/funny-cleaning-room-music.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="171" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_6ZCFMJv3-LxfDBMJnDhqkK_H5NdfzpsvqXgHz9z6vhQ6rzFQbXOJ6NjZIaUUS3dS8TJ2RFw2MGCFxJycJbHFUFlXt_91s4Es_9XsGyjQziHp_wPTQbHFLnmA0IdnCHHrTYifK3Zmybw/s200/funny-cleaning-room-music.jpg" width="200" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I suppose it’s that little thrill of being TOLD to do it, that enables me to do it in spite of myself. Many of the subs who are reading it may know what I’m talking about? That feeling of fulfillment when you know that special someone will be pleased when you’re following orders. Even though he may not check up on me every day, I know that if I’ve broken the rules he’ll be disappointed when he checks up on me.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">If that’s combined with a little reward I can give myself after completing my tasks, I may even get a little horny. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Btw … having a pair of those little loveballs tucked inside you while you clean makes cleaning a little more … interesting?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Music is mandatory ofcourse.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Nowadays I feel I have a bigger need of maintaining control than usual. I think that because of all this stuff with my mom having cancer, I’m afraid I’ll just end up crying in a corner if I loose my desperate grip on what little control I have.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I feel like I have to clean every single moment I can. Because I never know when I have to rush to her apartment because she’s ill. But my house is still a complete mess ...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I feel like I have to keep my feelings in check at all times. If I don’t, I’m afraid I’ll start crying and not be able to stop.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So how does that affect my life as a sub? Right now it doesn’t. Since I’m recently single, I’m not really looking for a Dom. But when the time comes, I’m afraid my newfound need of control will get in the way. Because entering a D/s-relationship as a sub is all about giving up control. Will I be able to do that? What will the results be if I do? Will I even dare try? If I don’t it may even get in the way of something wonderful one day.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The reason why I worry about this is that I’ve never dared play when I’ve been in an unstable mood. If I’ve been sad, upset or stressed I’ve always said no to play. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I know other subs do it. I know many of them find it therapeutic to be allowed to scream, cry, swear, fight or whatever it is that makes them able to let go of all those bad feelings.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But what if I try, and it’s just too much? Will I be able to pick myself up again? Will HE be able to pick me back up again? Or will I just be sent straight into a downward spiral? Into one of those bad periods that my bipolarity is so “kind” to grant me with?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I so want to try! But at the same time I’m I’m terrified to do so. Right now I feel the risk is too high. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I need to be there for my mom. I need to stay strong for her.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Then there are the times when my lack of control is a GOOD thing. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Sex …</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">During sex, and also during play with someone I trust, I’m able to let go completely. Giving me the most wonderful and almost instant orgasms, and the ability to enter subspace almost TOO quickly.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I never count my orgasms. Partners have tried, but they usually give up when they realize that they’ve barely started and I’ve already had a dozen or so orgasms. With the right motivation I’m able to stall them. But only up to a certain point.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I’ve been told I’m good for a mans self confidence. I wonder why? ;) </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Then there’s subspace. It tends to come quickly. Atleast if there’s been a proper warmup, and it’s not punishment I’m going through. If the sex is kinky, I may wind up in subspace just from that!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So, I guess my lack of control can be a good thing aswell. But most of the time I really wish I had more of it ...</span>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-50054869564190677882012-02-26T15:34:00.000+01:002012-02-27T19:42:16.800+01:00The X-files. Part 1 ...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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As some of you know, I deleted a lot of posts last year. I always thought I'd make up for it by writing new posts.<br />
However, I don't feel that I have. Those posts were the reason why I started the blog, and all of the sudden I'm ashamed of them? No, not anymore. From now on I'll randomly repost them until I've posted MOST of them. There are a couple that just feels just a bit TOO personal to share now that my blog isn't anonymous anymore.<br />
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This was the first post I wrote. About my first real encounter with my Master at the time. I did unfortunately fall in love with him eventually, but after reading this ... It seems like I had a crush on him from day one ;)<br />
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Oh the memories ...<br />
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<b><i>Important note:</i></b><br />
<i>To my friends ... The following text has a <b>huge</b> TMI -factor. (Too Much Information ...) So, if you don't want to know the most intimate details about my sexlife ... Then I suggest you skip reading this post ;)</i><br />
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<i>If anyone wants to judge me for posting this. Then don't. Keep it to yourself, because it's MY personal life. Not yours ...</i><br />
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.21291656023822725"><span style="font-family: Arial; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-size: large;"><i>Suddenly a Slavegirl</i></span></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">by Tepilawen</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So, I've been ordered to write this blog. Where to start? Where to end? Writing normally comes easy for me, but this? Writing about something as intimate and personal as this? This is going to be hard, but He ordered me to do this. And I'm kinda all about pleasing Him right now.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">They say that all good stories write themselves, hopefully that goes for blogs as well.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Back to my first question. Where to start? Well, what about starting with the beginning? It's surprisingly easy.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b><br />
<a name='more'></a><b id="internal-source-marker_0.21291656023822725"><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It started a couple of weeks ago. I was at a little get-together for kinksters in my area. He came a bit later than me, and I noticed him straightaway. I knew who he was, from his profile on FetLife, and he was too young for me. Or was I too old for him? Typically my luck ... Then he surprised me. He leaned back in his chair, smiled and looked me straight in the eyes. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">"So! What's it gonna take to get a date with you?" </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">My voice got stuck in my throat, and I wish it would have stayed there, because the words that came out of my mouth were:</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">"I'm sorry, but you're too young for me"</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Famous last words right? Wrong. You didn't think the story ended here did you? That would have been a pretty lousy story.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b><br />
<span id="internal-source-marker_0.21291656023822725"><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">We were both helping out with the local bdsm-group so we bumped in to each other again, then we started chatting on msn. And, then he took me by surprise again ...</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">"Wanna play after the next get-together?"</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I was staring at the screen, dumbfounded. My mind was a blank, what was I going to answer?</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The only thing that was going through my mind was</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">"I'm not this easy, I'm not this easy!"</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Turns out I am ... when it comes to Him anyway.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So the day came. I can't believe I even got some sleep the day before! I had preened and pruned, cleaned my house and changed the sheets. Or, I had started changing the sheets. I was done with the pillows when I checked the clock and realized I was late! I quickly changed into the outfit of the evening. Instead of the long skirt and rather modest top I had planned on wearing, I followed my first order from him and put on a short skirt and a top that showed off my cleavage. And since the order contained the words "and none of that pantyhose nonsense", I put on black thigh highs. Panties you ask? Of course not! As a friend of mine, who had played with him earlier, said: "You don't think you'll be allowed to wear panties around him do you?"</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I parked my car outside the pub, and in my hurry I almost slipped and fell on the ice. That didn't help my already frayed nerves a bit! Then the door to the pub was stuck. Of course it was ... Finally I got in the door, in one piece. He was facing the door. Relaxed and smiling. I didn't quite know what to say. Had he told the others? Or was our playdate our very own little secret? I said hello to everyone, and made sure I picked a seat where he had a good view to my outfit. I could tell he was pleased and I couldn't hold back a smile.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Later on he texted me. He had warned me about that. That I was to receive an order by text sometime during the evening. I was surprised that it was to send a picture of one of my breasts to his cell. I was certain that he'd want proof that I was pantyless? I had 15 minutes to go on. How was I going to sneak my cell with me to the toilet? Would the others guess what was going on? Would I blush so much that they'd realize something was going on? </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So. I went into the smallest toilet ever, took the pic and mailed it. Got back out and sat down. He received the picture and grinned. I tried not to blush, but when he exclaimed </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">"Hey! Wanna see something cool?" </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">and showed it to the guy sitting next to him! I blushed and sputtered something about men ... They grinned and laughed, I felt rather small and ... ehm ... turned on. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">An hour or so later the order that I first expected came. Only with a small addition. I had to choose between him showing the other guy that picture as well. Or, 50 lashes with the belt. I was feeling a bit cocky and was too much of a coward to choose the first option, so I chose the belt. I was pretty nervous about that as well, but right now it seemed to be the lesser of two evils ...</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Now he was on a roll, so the next order was for me to spread my legs so that he'd see my pussy. After texting him that I was to much of a coward to do that, and getting a reply that I wasn't, I spread my legs quickly and then closed them again. He smiled and nodded, satisfied with what he saw.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The evening dragged by. Weren't people ready to go soon? Then finally we could leave. I drove first, he followed me in his car. As I got closer and closer to home I got more and more nervous. How nervous would I be when we got home? It would probably be really awkward for the first hour or so. What had I done? My pussy must be governed by some other part of my brain though, because I felt myself getting wetter and wetter.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">We got to my house and I took my time getting out of the car. Trying to calm ones nerves and breathing takes time you know! </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He took care of my nervousness straight away. As I got out of the car I felt his hands on me, they were warm and strong. I was turned around, into his arms and his lips. As he kissed me it seems like the part that governs my pussy won the battle in my brain. We may have stood the for 30 seconds or 15 minutes. I really don't know. All I can remember is his lips, his hands, his arms, his body against mine. And the feeling of being safe. Yes, this could be a very good evening.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And now ladies and gentlemen, comes the juicy part. This is where things get a bit blurry for me. Oh don't get me wrong, I do remember details! Do I ever! But what I tell you now probably won't come in the correct order, and I certainly won't be able to tell you about every detail of the next wonderful 24 hours.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">His hands all over me, that's the motto of the day. Warm, strong hands who know their way around a woman's body. And kissing! Soft kissing, deep kissing, hot and heated kissing. Just can't get enough of those lips! Hmmm, since I know all too well that He is the first one to read this I blush as I'm writing this. I'm not good at this! At telling a man what I feel about him! Yet, this seems easy to me. Maybe because I know that he'll appreciate what he reads? That he won't snicker and laugh at me? I know he'll be pleased to read this. And as I told you to begin with, I'm all about pleasing Him right now ...</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The evening started with kissing, and him exploring my breasts. I have very sensitive breasts, but I'm really not used to them getting this much attention! They tingled and sent waves of pleasure all through my body. I could feel my breath quickening, my heart beating. My nipples were alive with small sparks sending me further and further into bliss. I suppose the words "I'm not this easy" should have been running through my head again, but I was beyond thinking. Instead I got my first orgasm, and my next, and my next. He was surprised about that ... I wasn't. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Then he started teasing me about it. Talking about using it as a party trick. Showing off how easily he can make me come. Maybe I should have gotten mad? I did get a bit embarrassed. But the idea also turned me on. I'm not much of an exhibitionist, but I do enjoy being used by my Dominant partner. Being His plaything, his to use as he pleases. I've been with other Dom's. But they haven't been interested in using me that way. Using me as their sexdoll, yes. And even though that's wonderful I've felt that somethings been missing. I didn't feel used enough ... if you know what I mean? So, yeah. The idea of him using me, humiliating me, in this manner turned me on.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But, I digress. Now where was I? Oh yeah ...</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Not before long both my top and my bra was lying in a heap. He then pulled me over his lap, with my bum in the air. I was surprised. I knew I was getting 50 strikes with the hand, and I’ve been spanked numerous times. But not like this. Not lying over His lap like this. If you haven't tried it you should. This way is so much better! I know it was supposed to be punishment, and I'm pretty sure it hurt. I even think I cried out a couple of times. But it felt so good! I was supposed to count down from 50, but I had to start over and over and over again. My brain was all mush, my vision was blurry and I think maybe I moaned when He spanked me? I do know I got several orgasms during that spanking. Somehow I was able to finish counting, by then it was really starting to be painful. But even though it hurt ... I've spent some time trying to figure out how to get another punishment like that. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I spent some more time lying over his knees. Totally exposed, with my skirt around my waist, my bum in the air and my feet spread wide. And his fingers deep inside me, fucking me with his hand. I think that was when I stopped trying to count my orgasms ...</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Then we kissed, he gave my breasts even more attention, we kissed some more, talked, cuddled. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Then came the moment I had dreaded. The belt ... Again, my position surprised me. First he put cuffs on me. No surprise there. Then he tied my feet and I started wondering about what he was planning. I had to get up on all 4, then he tied my hands and feet together. So I wasn't going anywhere. I love bondage! So once again my position was enough to get my juices going, to make me forget all about how to count backwards. So, I started counting, got it wrong, started counting again ... When I finally got the hang of it he apparently decided I was doing too well. Suddenly I felt his fingers in me, fingering me in between strokes. Even his tongue for one wonderful moment. Somehow I finally made it to 50. And by then I had definitely decided that I don't like that belt. It's not in any way a "good hurt".</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Oh, I forgot to tell you about sucking his cock! I told him before we met that I needed to practice deep throating and facefucking. And he kept his word when he said that I'd get plenty of practice. I love sucking cock, so I really didn't mind. The first time there was some teeth. I didn't get punished for it, and I made sure that didn't happen again. After a while I was able to take him all the way in without gagging. Even without him having to force my head further in. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And facefucking? How do you practice that? Well, you try to relax your throat, hope not to gag and watch your teeth. The same as deepthroating really. Only more brutal and intense. It's anything but pleasant for the one being fucked, but I love it. I love that feeling of being used, being just a thing made for His pleasure. Love the gagging, the gasping for air, the drooling and the tears. The best is to be backbound, kneeling and held firmly by the hair whilst being roughly facefucked. Throw in a couple of faceslaps and you'll soon have a very horny and wet little slavegirl.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He was gentle with me though. Some facefucking and some breath control with his cock blocking my airways. I suspect he won't be as gentle after reading this ...</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Then we had sex. Right there on the floor. And as everything else, it was great. Not the rough, quick sex I was expecting. But slow, wonderful sex. That man is just full of surprises. Seems that I should just throw away everything I think I know about Dominant men ... </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">As we were lying there, and I was far gone into orgasmworld he shared his fantasies with me. Exciting, thrilling and a bit scary fantasies. They registered, but I wasn't really able to come up with any coherent responses. The occasional face slap soon fixed that though. I wasn't able to contribute much, but I don't think that was the point either? There were a few times where I desperately tried to focus on his face, trying to remember what the question was. Seeing his smiling face, he seemed slightly amused, come into focus as I struggled to concentrate was a good motivational factor. It was also distracting, because then the first thing that popped into my head was "Oh hey! *blissful grin*" Didn't say that though. Don't really know what I said, but it was good enough not to earn me any more face slaps. Darn! Don't really think those face slaps was the best motivator. Since I tend to enjoy them. In that weird masochistic way ... So I was lying there thinking, should I answer? Or should I try to provoke some more slaps? The angel on my shoulder won though. Or was it just that wish to please and obey him that started to take over completely?</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Sometime during the evening, I think it was before my punishment with the belt? Ok, don't complain! I told you I'd get everything in the wrong order</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Well, so before the belt. I had to do something that was a bit hard for me. I have this tendency to talk before I think. When you do that whilst talking to a Dominant it can cause consequences ... So what did I blurt out without thinking? I said that playing with myself whilst someone is watching is really, really hard for me ...</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So there I was, naked except from my thigh highs. He was still fully dressed. He told me to lie down on the floor. So I did, a bit reluctantly. Suddenly I felt very vulnerable. I was told to spread my legs, have one arm down my side and use the other to play with myself. He stood by my feet. Watching me. Suddenly I felt so small! It was embarrassing, and I just wanted to hide. But he had that half-smile of his, and he told me what to do. Ordered me not to stop. So I didn't. I fought the bad feelings, even though the tears were pressing on. He told me I'd done well, and it felt good. Somehow it wasn't so scary anymore.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">We cuddled, kissed, talked. Then moved into the bed. But first I had to finish changing the sheets. I've never fumbled so much with that in my life! He layid down on his side of the bed, one arm under his head, the other hand stroking his cock while watching me. How was I supposed to concentrate when he was laying there like that? </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Well, somehow I was able to finish making the bed and we both crawled under the covers. It was warmer there. And in some ways more intimate. We'd both been naked for a while. Vi cuddled, made out, talked. I was allowed to have even more orgasms! Lucky me! I was amazed that a slut like me would be worthy of that much sexual pleasure! He enjoys watching me come though. So it was for his pleasure as well. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The he asked me, and I couldn't believe it. Did I want to make this a permanent thing? Me being his sub, and he being my Dom? I didn't have to think about what to answer this time. No need to consult my friend. I answered yes without thinking.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Sometime during the night we went to sleep. Well, actually it was more morning than night. I was allowed to sleep with my hands and feet tied. Not too tight, since I'd be tied up for a while. I loved it! I've always dreamt of it, but have only been allowed to do it once before, and then only on my hands. It was uncomfortable at times, but then again that's part of the deal isn't it? </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Next time he's promised that I'll be allowed to sleep with my hands tied behind my back. If it starts hurting I can wake him up and he'll tie my hands in the front instead. I'm so looking forward to that! </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">We really slept in the next morning. I was awake before him, but didn't want to wake him. So I just laid there for a while, processing the past 12 hours in my mind. Watching him. Dreaming of what was to come. I must have dozed off. Because he woke me up. Kissed me, and told me to give him a blow-job. I was only happy to oblige. Isn't it great girls, to feel him grow in your mouth? Knowing that his cock is growing because he wants you? It was awkward though, with my hands and feet still being tied up ... I managed to wriggle under the covers and find a somewhat comfortable position though. And it felt satisfying, that I was able to please him even though it was a bit awkward and hard. It was hot under there too. So hot in fact that I had trouble breathing sometimes.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But I didn't want to disappoint him, so I got through it. And, after a while I got so turned on by sucking his cock that I forgot all about the heat and the ropes around my wrists. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I got my reward for that. He fingered me and played with my clit. Gave me some powerful orgasms. One was so strong that I tore my hands straight out from the rope! I was so distraught over that! He had been so kind as to tie me, and I slipped out of the ropes! He didn't stop massaging my clit though, so I wasn't able to think about it much. Later I apologized. He wasn't mad or disappointed with me. Said that it only proved that he hadn't bound me too tight. Then he tied my wrists up again. Tighter this time. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I crawled up next to him and we cuddled for a while. Then an alarm on his cell went off.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">"By the way. You've earned 90 lashes with the belt now"</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">What? What had I done wrong? He wouldn't tell me. Said I had to guess, but that he'd tell me if I hadn't guessed it by the time I had earned 100 lashes. My mind was a blank. What had I done wrong? I went through the past 12 hours in my mind, but couldn't come up with anything. 10 minutes later he told me. I had gotten one lash with the belt for every minute that the coffee wasn't ready. Frak! He told me about that the night before! That he wanted the coffee ready at a certain time. I wanted to jump out of bed straightaway, but he wanted to cuddle. Promised me that I wouldn't get anymore lashes. So I crawled into his arms again. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">A bit later I made coffee. With my hands and feet still tied together. It must have been quite amusing, watching me hop around in the kitchen.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">We weren't quite ready to get out of bed though. We snuggled, talked, kissed. I spent some more time under the sheets. Giving him BJ's and getting turned on by it every time. Then we fell asleep. That coffee was pretty strong by the time we got up! I was still only wearing my thigh highs but was allowed to dress for breakfast.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I made baguettes and we talked while we ate. He claimed the coffee was good, even though it must have been really strong.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">When he was done eating he looked at me intensely. Then he came towards me. I figured something was going on, but was uncertain as to what? The he gave me a mischievous grin and jumped at me, pushing me down at the couch. The last half of my baguette remained uneaten on my plate, but I really didn't care. We were making out and snuggling for a while. And oh yeah, that "hands all over my body"-thing that I told you about. Oh, the luxury!</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He had brought "The Secretary" so decided we'd watch it. First it was the matter of my punishment though. He felt that 100 lashes at a time was too much for me, since I'm so bad at counting. So I got to choose if I wanted 40 or 60 before the film, and then the rest after. I chickened out and chose 40 strokes. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">This time there was no bondage or lying over the lap. He pulled down my sweatpants and I had to stand still while he used the belt on me. So, the rules of the game are: </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Number 1: Count the strokes downward to zero. If I miss I have to start all over again. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Number 2: Stand still! If I move I have to start all over again.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You already know that I suck at counting backwards. I did even worse this time. When I finally did manage to count down properly, I moved when I got to 1! I couldn't believe it! He held me and I cried. I got a moments respite before we tried again. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">This time I got to hold his hand. And I held on as if my life depended on it. Focusing on his hand, his arm. Feeling the strength in it. Feeling how warm it was, and the sensation of the hair on his arm on the side of my hand. It helped. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So I somehow managed to get it right. With a few mishaps of course. When I was done he pulled up my pants and told me I'd done well. Then he held me while I cried for a bit. It was good standing there, feeling his warm body against mine. So I managed to pull myself together quicker than I thought I would. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">We tried playing "The Secretary" in the dvd-player in my living room. But, of course that old piece of crap had decided to die on me ... I almost wish I could tell you that I'm sneaky enough to have sabotaged the thing, but I'm not. So we ended up watching it in bed, naked under the covers. Oh, what a shame! </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">If you haven't seen that movie yet you really should! It's funny, sweet and arousing. If you're into BDSM anyways ... </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And, if you have a good looking Sir who kisses you, plays with your nipples or fingers you every once in a while, just long enough to make you forget the movie is on. And then stop ... making your body tingle with anticipation. Well, that will really enhance the whole movie experience!</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And what do you do after watching that movie? You have sex. Of course you do. So we did. And I spent some more time underneath those covers. When we got warm I got to stroke and have my hands all over HIS body. And I loved it! </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Fortunately that led to even more sex. If not I think I'd have been incredibly frustrated! After we were done I got to lick him clean of my juices. And he decided that would be one of our first rules. That I'm always to lick his cock clean after sex. Again. Lucky me! Especially since I get to decide when it's clean ...</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Now it was time for dinner. Fortunately I had realized that I might be rather preoccupied, so I had prepared marinated chicken with vegetables and rice. Quick and easy. He asked me to put on some clothes he'd seen in my profile. So I did. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I already had my thight highs on, gotta buy more of that brand. They don't slip and I hardly noticed they were on. Then I got out my black leatherette "skirt". Yes, I hyphenate. Because calling that a skirt is a joke! It's more like a broad belt? I put it on and then put on one of my black corset tops. I was a bit embarrassed when I went out in the living room. My bum was sticking out of the skirt no matter how hard I pulled on it. He looked at me with an approving grin.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I felt a bit awkward preparing dinner in that outfit. At the same time it was a bit exciting preparing dinner for my Sir in sexy fetish wear. I could feel myself getting wetter as I cut the vegetables. Wetter? I didn't think that was possible. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Fortunately I've prepared this type of meal umpteen times. It's quick, but you have to remember to put everything on in time, keep track of 4 cooking plates and make sure you don't burn the sauce. Frying the chicken in oil felt kinda risky with so much unprotected skin. I just barely dodged a few drops of hot oil that sizzled their way out of the pan.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He was relaxing with the laptop as I was running back and forth, groping my bum when I passed him. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I was a bit nervous when we started eating. Was the chicken dry? Or too spicy? Were the vegetables overcooked? Fortunately it seemed like I'd been lucky with everything and we enjoyed our meal together. Talking as we ate.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">After our meal we kept on talking for a while. I was told to keep my legs spread so that he had a full view of my pussy at all times. I had to giggle when I remembered talking to a Dom who explained to me how important it was that his sub was proper and a picture of perfection at all times. Nothing wrong with that, but the contrasts were so extreme that I had to laugh. Here I was, in the skimpiest of clothes. My make-up just a faded memory, my hair all messed up. Both the direct result of lots and lots of sex and play. To complete the image my thigh highs had gotten holes in them, and my legs were spread wide apart to show off my wet pussy. I told him, and we both had a good laugh.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Then it was time for the final part of my punishment. I got to choose between counting down the 60 remaining lashes myself. Or getting 100 that he'd count down for me. I chose the 100, figuring that if I did the counting myself I'd probably end up with 150 before I got the counting right. He asked me if I wanted to receive the lashes standing, or on all four. Remembering how I lost my footing earlier in the day I chose the latter. It's easier to remain still when you're ehm ... closer to the floor.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It's about time I tell you about that belt. Most belts are just a broad leather strap with a buckle at one end and holes in the other. This belt has both those things, but instead of the simple leather strap, this belt has an extra strap sewn on top of it and something put in between those two again to make the upper strap have a "top". The result? A rather heavy belt with no soft edges whatsoever. So it hurts more than most belts, with a sharp stinging pain.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial;"><span style="font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Since I didn't have to count I could just focus on the pain. And I'm glad I did. By the time he started counting down the last 5 lashes I was shaking. When he was done I just rolled into a ball. Crying hard. He laid down beside me and held me as I cried. When you lie close to your Sir like that after heavy play or punishment. When you're maybe the most vulnerable you'll ever be. And he holds you, comforts you and lets you calm down at your own pace. That may just be when you feel the closest to him, the most intimate. When I lay there I felt so much gratitude! He had taken the effort to punish me, to correct me for my errors. And as he did so he made me feel safe and comfortable. Gave me the strength to endure the pain without using my codeword. Now he was comforting me. Lying on the hard floor with me. Yes, I was crying. But they were tears of cleansing. Not of sadness or despair. I wanted to tell him "Thank you Sir", but I don't think I did. If I did he probably wouldn't have understood it through all the sobbing. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">After that we watched a video lying on the couch. A really sweet episode of some reality show from Playboy channel. It ended all too soon.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It was time for him to leave. But first he asked me if there was anything I wanted to do before he left. The only thing that came to mind was to cuddle some more. So I sat on his lap for a while. We kissed and talked. Somehow we started talking about being a sub vs being a slave. About how I don't complain about it being so hot under the covers when I give him a blow-job in bed that I can hardly breathe. About how it doesn't occur to me to refuse or discuss when I get an order. To me an order given by my Sir is supposed to be obeyed. And asking him to take down the covers so it won't be so hot for me? Unthinkable! He'd get cold! We also talked about the fact that it's OK for me if he wants to share me with his friends. How it's ok with me if he wants to play with or even have sex with someone else. Even if it's in front of me while I'm tied up and helplessly watching.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">To me it just seems natural that I'm his property. His to use as he wishes, for his pleasure. My pleasure is a gift that is given me by him. It's nothing I should take for granted. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So we decided that I'm his slave. Not his sub. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It feels more right. To be a slave</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Now, this may not fit your idea of what a slave is. What defines a slave? As far as I know there's no official rulebook when it comes to these things. But that's what I am. His obedient little slave girl. By our perception of the concept.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Then he told me to kneel by his feet. He put a blanket around me so I wouldn't be cold. Then he just watched me. His dog came over and lay down beside us. He looked at the dog, then he looked at me.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">"There you are. My obedient little slave and my obedient dog. Sitting next to each other on the floor. How does that make you feel?"</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Somehow I didn't feel degraded by that. It's OK. I'm his slave, so I belong on the floor by his feet. So I just sat there. Content, and suddenly a bit shy, by his feet.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">They say that endings are the hardest to write. Who's saying that? Probably those people who think the beginning is the easy part. So how does this end? It doesn't. It's an ongoing story as my Sir and I take this wonderful journey together. Want to join us? Subscribe to my blog and I'll keep you updated.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">With respect</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">tepilawen</span>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><i>Now that I've reread thish I'm blushing profusely. Think I'd better hit the "Publish"-button before I change my mind ;) </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><i>Hope you enjoyed it, more x-files will pop up every now and then ...</i></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-77534257317125765632012-02-21T12:05:00.000+01:002012-02-27T19:43:02.901+01:00Me ... Now ...<span id="internal-source-marker_0.9582034021150321"></span><br />
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.9582034021150321"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">What’s going on with me, my life and my BDSM? Seems like most of my posts lately have been reviews, which I love doing. But things need to get more personal. And more frequent. I’ve really been slacking for a while, leaving my blog more or less dormant.</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">In a way you might say I’m starting the blog all over again. I’m still me, I’m still a masochistic sub, I’ll still be writing about sex and kink. But I’ll also be sharing more of myself.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So what about me? Now?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The most obvious thing to those around me is that I’m tired. Not the kind of tired that a good nights sleep will fix, but the kind that seems to be here to stay for a while.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The main reason to all this exhaustion is the fact that my mom has cancer. For some reason I’ve been keeping that a secret for a long time now. At first it was because I simply wasn’t able to talk about it without crying. And when I started I just wasn’t able to stop.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I honestly don’t know why I’ve kept staying quiet about it, but I have recently told some people. So I guess the cat is out of the bag.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Watching a loved one battle with cancer is hard. Helplessly standing by when she’s in so much pain she can’t even walk 3 steps. Watching her struggle with nausea, dehydration and malnourishment. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Never being able to fully relax, because I’m waiting for the phone to ring. And if it isn’t? Why not? Has she fallen? Is she hospitalized again? Is she really ill?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Somehow I’m able to be there for her. I rarely cry, and when I do I pull myself together almost immediately. I never cry in front of her. I cry in the car, in the bathroom, when I take out the trash. But I never, ever cry in front of her …</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Cancer … it sucks!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Other than that. Not much. I had a boyfriend for a while, but we recently broke up. Noone did anything wrong and he’s a great guy. But somehow my feelings didn’t make it past that first crush.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Being single again is weird! No textmessages throughout the day, no phonecalls. And pretty soon I guess I’ll really start noticing that no sex part.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial;"><span style="font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">And I've gotten a roommate! My friend needed a place to live, and I needed the rent. So now she's renting my old bedroom and I've moved into my old office. Too small for a double bed, but I probably won't need anything like that in a while.</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So, there’s lots to talk about. Even though I’m single, celibate and haven’t had a proper playsession in months.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Hopefully that doesn’t make people loose interest in my blog. I hope you’ll atleast give the new version a chance.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-65688165075848686142012-02-12T22:52:00.000+01:002012-02-27T19:43:25.147+01:00Happy Valentines Day!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYdLLzTHoMLZmZIg94plNIpUKxQG4FxIPJ0kloYqrustcUAt5nLG-PU7dRm4OwApVLXVhZ6XOJdsQnWR26KEtiBEJKt8LDzBoOIshNZv85oB5U5h10Ja-GYD48OMNLNROqGvn5PY_Jl3A/s1600/hoboken-anti-valentines-day.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="248" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYdLLzTHoMLZmZIg94plNIpUKxQG4FxIPJ0kloYqrustcUAt5nLG-PU7dRm4OwApVLXVhZ6XOJdsQnWR26KEtiBEJKt8LDzBoOIshNZv85oB5U5h10Ja-GYD48OMNLNROqGvn5PY_Jl3A/s320/hoboken-anti-valentines-day.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span id="internal-source-marker_0.8196170323062688"><span style="font-family: Arial;"><span style="font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Only 2 days left to Valentines Day now. It’s not really a big deal here in Norway. In spite of desperate attempts to make it so by all the shops that sells flowers, cards and heart shaped candy.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I can’t really decide if I like the Valentines Day or not … I don’t think I’ve ever gotten any special attention on that day, so I’ve never had the chance to test it out.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Also, it interferes with my birthday! Being born just around both Valentines Day and the Norwegian Mothers Day tends to lessen the value of all three days out a bit. “Happy Birthday” just doesn’t have the same ring to it when an “Oh, just so you know … That includes Mothers Day and Valentines as well.” is included.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But, I guess I’ll just have to learn to live with that. I really don’t think there’s a man alive that will bother to make 3 days in a row seem special in their own way. And they don’t seem to realize that Valentines is supposed to be about THEM aswell ...</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But I digress … I was really going to address those of you whoare actually planning to do something special for Valentines.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Do you have something planned? Are you the type who plans things weeks or even months in advance? Do you wing it? Or do you simply panic?</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></span><br />
<a name='more'></a><span id="internal-source-marker_0.8196170323062688"><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Don’t worry, there’s still lots you can do … and now I’m not just talking about the men. If you girls suspect your significant other is planning something. It’s only fair that you do something back. Getting an “Oh, I didn’t bother doing something”-type of response really doesn’t make anyone want to make an effort for the next special occasion. Believe me, I know … </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Sooo … what to do when there’s only 2 days left?</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Some webstores will actually be able to deliver a gift over night, so that’s worth checking out.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Gift certificates is kind of an easy way out, but if you make an effort with how it’s delivered it will still be a welcome gift.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">What about attaching it to a nice bouquet of flowers? Or putting it inside a box of candy? Making a treasure hunt out of it can make it a fun experience.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Fortunately for those of you that didn’t start planning Valentines 10 seconds after Christmas was over, the stores are open tomorrow</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> … </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Think! What does he/she wish for? Do you know of something they don’t even realize they want? Maybe something they mentioned in a casual conversation months ago?</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And, does it really have to be heart shaped jewelry and silly little bears? What about a nice set of tools for the handy person and some crafting materials for the artistic one? Or tickets for the movies, books, cd’s etc …</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And then there’s the “Gift certificate” for something personal. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">What about 10 vouchers for orgasms? Massage? Oral sex?</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Vouchers for a cozy night on the couch, or for a night with the girls. Watching football with the guys. Doing the dishes …</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Make a meal …</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Together, or for your loved one. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Write “I love you” in the steam on the mirror if you shower first.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Send textmessages throughout the day.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Enjoy the day.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">SHOW that you CARE!</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And most importantly … Even though this is the day when you’re “supposed” to show your loved one how much you care. You can actually do that in both small and big ways all year round. Don’t let an entire year pass before you do something romantic again.</span></span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-63234062418530860552012-02-11T11:47:00.001+01:002012-02-27T19:43:46.761+01:00More clamps ... Oh, so lovely!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXdpejnt0qqjnVrO9hV06c3MI3uZliqcWfuUAf52X70-S0gAq0s6C5R2VK5wAi7M1kX58CynqfyJThpXOe1Y9NOjy5D3elCqeTGtdFs-ABe_y2w-BpeVVi4BGmvbQh_73xeUSgNpxxfww/s1600/yclamp2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXdpejnt0qqjnVrO9hV06c3MI3uZliqcWfuUAf52X70-S0gAq0s6C5R2VK5wAi7M1kX58CynqfyJThpXOe1Y9NOjy5D3elCqeTGtdFs-ABe_y2w-BpeVVi4BGmvbQh_73xeUSgNpxxfww/s200/yclamp2.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
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My little box of <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/">sex toys</a> have gotten another new addition from the good people at <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/" target="">Eden Fantasys</a>. This is the first toy I'm not a 100% satisfied with. At the same time I think this is the toy that will quickly become my personal favourite.<br />
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I immediately chose these <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/clamps/sex-toy-1134">nipple clamps</a> from my list of options. There was really no doubt if I wanted them or not. What I chose was a set <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/y-style-clamps-with-clit-clamp/adult-toys-dvds-25877" target="">Y-style clamps with clit clamp</a>.<br />
Now, I've already got my <a href="http://tepilawen.blogspot.com/2011/11/butterflies.html">Butterfly Clamps</a>. I suspect those will soon become any sadists favourite, since they really, really hurt!<br />
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The <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/y-style-clamps-with-clit-clamp/adult-toys-dvds-25877">Y-style clamps</a> however, will soon become the favourite of any masochist like me. I'm not a painslut, but I do enjoy pain. To a certain level.<br />
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The only thing that made me a bit anxious about the set was the clit clamp. Wot? A clamp on my clit? BIG ouch possibilities!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhns5_NyY7aeBblWzaerqRHhLGOEGiojcLHcUlz3mCEtokRozIxynFsVUSoguzolJqbKKHnipvCfbWr4UwcQyx9hawYO8wC-GbvKgGtsXnlKvjfGv2irAbFP5eRVC36HDPloqZqfyQcZ0I/s1600/yclamp1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhns5_NyY7aeBblWzaerqRHhLGOEGiojcLHcUlz3mCEtokRozIxynFsVUSoguzolJqbKKHnipvCfbWr4UwcQyx9hawYO8wC-GbvKgGtsXnlKvjfGv2irAbFP5eRVC36HDPloqZqfyQcZ0I/s200/yclamp1.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
When I got the box I was happy with the fact that it felt rather heavy. In it there were shiny chain and clamps that can be adjusted. Which is one of the reasons why I chose this set among all the other <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/clamps/sex-toy-1134">nipple clamps</a>. I like the fact that they can be adjusted. That way my Dom can give me both pleasure and pain with the same set. No swithing gear or fiddling about. All he has to do is tighten the screws to vary the grade of pain. Or pleasure ...<br />
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Then I opened the box, and the first disappointment came. The chains ... They're not as heavy as they look. Personally I'd rather have thinner chain, that matches the weight. Although these chains are made from metal they feel kinda plasticky. I'm gonna try them out a few times more, and then I'll consider if I want to switch them out with some heavier chain. No problem for me, since I'm a DIY kinda person, but not everyone wants to bother with stuff like that.<br />
The reason why I may wanna replace them with something heavier is that I want that weight on my nipples. At the same time the manufacturers may have chosen a light chain on purpose. It's a lot of chain when the clit clamp is attached, so it may be that a heavier chain would just be TOO heavy.<br />
But, heavy or not ... they look really cool with those thick chains.<br />
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Let's adress disappointment number two straightaway shall we? The rubber ends on the clamps. They fall of when the clamp isn't tightened propely. Not a big problem, but I'd rather not have them fall off in my toy bag. Nothing a dash of glue can't fix it in no time though.<br />
Something that more than weighs off the fact that I need to get out a tube of glue, is that on <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/">Eden Fantasys</a> web page they're labeled as latex free. Now, my latex allergy isn't so bad that I need to stay away from clamps with latex on them. I think ... But if I'm given the option between latex and latex free I'll always choose the latter. Also, I know women who under no circumstances whatsoever could have worn these clamps if there was latex in them. So I'll more than gladly recommend both the clamps and <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/">Eden Fantasys</a> to them.<br />
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Now, lets get down to buisness here. The clamps. How do I like them??<br />
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I LOVE THEM!!!<br />
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I didn't at first. Because I couldn't tighten them enough to keep the falling off. Then I realized I was turning the screw the wrong way ... DOH!<br />
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So, lesson learned. I did it the correct way, and it didn't take me long before I had both <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/clamps/sex-toy-1134">nipple clamps</a> screwed on just tight enough to make it fell pretty great. I had no problem tightening them just enough so that they gave me chills and shivers and all those wonderful feelings I was hoping to get. Pulling on the chain made it feel even better. During play I suspect my Dom now will have an easy shorcut to giving me instant orgasms. Or, to just keep me on the brink of them. Delicious torture.<br />
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Then there was the clit clamp. I had actually decided that I'd just hide it on the bottom on my box, it being easily detachable and all. But hey, the things I do for my readers. I figured I can't write a proper review if I haven't tried the whole product.<br />
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I drew my breath, braced myself and fastened the clamp. OH! It felt ... great! I never would have thought! And here I was, not even in the right kind of mood. Just really curious and too impatient to waith for my Dom to come visit. Pleasurealert!<br />
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Ofcourse I had to tighten them all the way aswell. And yes, they can hurt. But, at a more tolerable level than the Butterfly Clamps.<br />
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So, all in all. Despite of those small details I wasn't too happy about. This is my favourite <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/">sex toy</a> so far. Considering the fact that they can both hurt and give great pleasure, they can soon become a favourite for both masochist and sadist.<br />
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<a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/"><img alt="Sex toys - EdenFantasys adult toys store" border="0" height="300" src="http://cdn1.edenfantasys.com/Images/ef/ef-200x300.jpg" title="Sex toys - EdenFantasys adult toys store" width="200" /></a><br />
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<span class="strong" style="background-color: white; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 22px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: initial; outline-style: initial; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"> "This product was provided to me free of charge by Eden Fantasys in exchange for an unbiased review. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines."</span></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-69571158757963844522011-11-19T15:04:00.001+01:002011-11-19T15:25:10.818+01:00Rules for life ...<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj6J_K5AbkzGayTEnXOj_f_qW1eW0zxswLnMSW0IqUGv7je0InvtpSSPlFM9nXO72NY4li2TG5RBni1dc-1nLOz7xUyUcdlkxqOuK8m7peBo_kxmIclH0uuC1x01Og3t800OHqFPksBtUA/s1600/DSC01740.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj6J_K5AbkzGayTEnXOj_f_qW1eW0zxswLnMSW0IqUGv7je0InvtpSSPlFM9nXO72NY4li2TG5RBni1dc-1nLOz7xUyUcdlkxqOuK8m7peBo_kxmIclH0uuC1x01Og3t800OHqFPksBtUA/s320/DSC01740.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">G.I.D (glad i deg) = ILU (I Love You)</td></tr>
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<span id="internal-source-marker_0.8118716988246888" style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Life just gave me a rude wakeup-call … It made me realize that some things are more important in life than others. Here’s my new “rules” for life, feel free to adopt them as your own:</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">...</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">…..</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">…....</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Tell people you love them, often. You never know when it’s your last chance to do so.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Buy flowers for those you love NOW. They won’t be able to enjoy them if you wait until you have to put flowers on their grave.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Don’t let anyone sit alone on the holidays</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Make sure your children know their grandparents</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Do things together, create good memories</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Turn the tv and laptop off during meals, talk about your day instead</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Don’t stay mad. A disagreement is rarely so bad that it’s worth hating eachother for the rest of your lives …</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Say “I love you, but right now I don’t like you very much”, instead of claiming that you hate someone you actually love</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Don’t yell. Talk</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Don’t critizise unless you have to. Give praise as often as possible, without overdoing it</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">There’s something good and beautiful in everyone. Make an effort to find it instead of looking for flaws in a person</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Be tolerant</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Take care of your health. The people that love you are just as afraid of loosing you, as you are of loosing them.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Call your parents atleast once a week, but don’t forget to visit them aswell</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Make new traditions for your family, don’t forget the old ones</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Last but not least …</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">...</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">…..</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">…....</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Remember that Destiny is a cruel mistress. You never know when she’ll decide to take away someone you love</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWie1wq_Qvvux-XL2tkHLoUzPEaLxgpBmZpZ2c8c56cO7LmzfSl1waARzReTvNu_q2Yc_sJG9roXkcukY-0nEZbgjQ4Tunuf6nzX4RBsrqlTPK52stTr4QYH5CTp2A4kU6A8cz1gFHIsw/s1600/DSC01673.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWie1wq_Qvvux-XL2tkHLoUzPEaLxgpBmZpZ2c8c56cO7LmzfSl1waARzReTvNu_q2Yc_sJG9roXkcukY-0nEZbgjQ4Tunuf6nzX4RBsrqlTPK52stTr4QYH5CTp2A4kU6A8cz1gFHIsw/s320/DSC01673.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1EL-EAuzhwZUnqUv184q8KQTn3aRngUe4ZN_OOyjZ6ofRMZpjTg6xitm7vfpfbt280yeS73tlnwj5UV5c9G6lDmgRPeWexBDrmMuG-WjdFspEThOHygLPeVas52ksaFZOkTv9XudYBFc/s1600/sexy-kiss.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="185" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1EL-EAuzhwZUnqUv184q8KQTn3aRngUe4ZN_OOyjZ6ofRMZpjTg6xitm7vfpfbt280yeS73tlnwj5UV5c9G6lDmgRPeWexBDrmMuG-WjdFspEThOHygLPeVas52ksaFZOkTv9XudYBFc/s320/sexy-kiss.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span id="internal-source-marker_0.8634622828103602" style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">One of the advantages of being single, is that you can flirt with whomever you want. Another advantage is that you have the opportunity to experience that magical first kiss. Of course, not all first kisses are magical. Some are “just” nice, some are really good, and a few are just awkward.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But, every once in a while you get to experience the kind of first kiss that inspires movies, romantic novels, art and poetry.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The thing about that kind of kiss I’m talking about is that it starts a while before the kiss itself. It starts with flirting, or a look, by bumping into each other at a party. It starts when you meet someone who makes you FEEL them, even though you’re not even touching each other. Do you know the feeling I’m talking about? When you KNOW he’s standing behind you, even though you can’t see or hear him. But you can tell that he’s there from the way your skin tingles, your breath catches in your chest, your heartbeat quickens. If he’s sitting next to you it gets hard to concentrate, you feel that you may as well be naked. </span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Then, when that magical moment finally arrives. When you realize he’s going to kiss you. For a brief moment, time stops. All of the sudden you’re extremely aware of HIM, and the rest if the world is blurred out. </span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Hopefully, if you’re lucky. That won’t be the last time you kiss him (or her, if that’s your preference). Hopefully, that won’t be the last time one of his kisses has that magical feel to it.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Let’s just cross our fingers, shall we?</span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-4687099245939827222011-11-07T22:01:00.003+01:002012-02-27T19:45:02.052+01:00Butterflies<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGzE9r-_MXLC2-QtO0tPekQlGzlp7ut-4E_j2c3Sj5JpW1iCQQCkbrABi_A5BtTAK_35MN7CpNqte1gZvBDkkuDqglzn0uw2lFmwyMLE30PyfXTZtHeBNUh29-8Ymann6gitbd64cFc_E/s1600/header_butterfly2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="80" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGzE9r-_MXLC2-QtO0tPekQlGzlp7ut-4E_j2c3Sj5JpW1iCQQCkbrABi_A5BtTAK_35MN7CpNqte1gZvBDkkuDqglzn0uw2lFmwyMLE30PyfXTZtHeBNUh29-8Ymann6gitbd64cFc_E/s320/header_butterfly2.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; white-space: pre-wrap;">Normally you only find butterflies outside in the summer, but even though it’s November I actually have 3 of them in my house. One is an actual butterfly, which has decided to hibernate in my hallway. It sits up in the corner, pretending to be invisible …</span></h1>
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The other two however are made of metal and reside in my little box of toys. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And, if you just guessed that this will be another toy review, then you’re absolutely right.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">My new toys from Eden Fantasys are a set of<a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/butterfly/adult-toys-dvds-25760"> Butterfly</a> nipple clamps. I didn’t own any <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/clamps/sex-toy-1134">nipple clamps</a>, so I was really happy for the opportunity to try out these.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">My first reaction was ….</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 48pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">OUCH!!! O.o </span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj14_s9cIwsuwh5Ljq5KltJak_DSAmSEbPqqWSuPPXX3cvm7OuwmjAezjfTJErkQT9FCMNnbUC7qVKD0JmXlReZUoR8rOHWSGmn7m7zohDXOTcnq3-LSzGtARiTTvUIZWL0Y6IjjKYfDyw/s1600/butterflyclamps.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj14_s9cIwsuwh5Ljq5KltJak_DSAmSEbPqqWSuPPXX3cvm7OuwmjAezjfTJErkQT9FCMNnbUC7qVKD0JmXlReZUoR8rOHWSGmn7m7zohDXOTcnq3-LSzGtARiTTvUIZWL0Y6IjjKYfDyw/s200/butterflyclamps.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">They hurt! I know they’re supposed to, but they’re REALLY painful!</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I’ve only tried them in non-play mode, and they actually brought tears to my eyes. Hopefully, when I’m in a playsession, with all those wonderful endorphins coursing through my system, they won’t hurt as much. If they work like the clover clamps they seem to be a copy of, they should tighten as you pull on the chain. Thing is, I don’t think I’ll be able to take much more of that. Not in non-playmode anyway.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I really wanted to test them in play before I wrote this review, but I just haven’t had the opportunity and didn’t want to put this off. But rest assured, when I do get to try them out, I’ll tell you all about it.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">As for the quality … It seems to be quite good. There’s nothing about them that suggests that they will fall apart anytime soon. And believe you me, I’ve tugged and pulled, bent and pushed. So if they were going to fall apart, they would have. The clamps themselves have these little rubberpads. In addition to make sure that your nipple doesn’t get totally squashed, they also ensure that the clamps won’t slip off.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> also like the fact that they’re black. For some reason I like that better than the dull metal colour most things like this have.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">To sum it all up … These are NOT for beginners. But if you’re a painslut or want to try out that really intense tearbringing pain. If you’re a sadist with a preference for nipple torture … This certainly seems like something you should consider adding to your collection of <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/">sex toys</a>.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Hmm, I just remembered … I’m hosting a play-party this weekend. I won’t be playing, but maybe someone would like to try them out? Insert evil grin ...</span><br />
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<a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Sex toys - EdenFantasys adult toys store" border="0" height="300" src="http://cdn1.edenfantasys.com/Images/ef/ef-200x300.jpg" title="Sex toys - EdenFantasys adult toys store" width="200" /></a></div>
</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-2046907340536739392011-09-29T12:42:00.002+02:002012-02-27T19:45:51.269+01:00Loveballs<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmcRf7alIHXtoIeOxG6IQzmiw2y9yBSwg-AfBFEsv2xy1Ko0uNd6Z1Nfzb9QDvkB4EUfVOhw65mxizP5g2GeId3LwmKZZGTc76D0nBqRpjwok9mQuwwF3STJHf5hbcCSHJy-LMM__zRsE/s1600/crystal+balls.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmcRf7alIHXtoIeOxG6IQzmiw2y9yBSwg-AfBFEsv2xy1Ko0uNd6Z1Nfzb9QDvkB4EUfVOhw65mxizP5g2GeId3LwmKZZGTc76D0nBqRpjwok9mQuwwF3STJHf5hbcCSHJy-LMM__zRsE/s320/crystal+balls.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span id="internal-source-marker_0.9006837927736342" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Let me start this review with a short rant. I hate Norwegian customs. I’ve been waiting for my latest product to review for what seems like a small eternity now. I was rather impatient to begin with, sinceI was looking forward to getting these things in the mail. And when I guessed they should arrive soon I got a letter from the Norwegian customs. My package had been detained and I had to send in forms, receipts and confirmations. Well, getting the paperwork I needed was easy. I mailed the good people at Eden Fantasys, and the next day I had gotten everything I needed from there. Then all I had to do was pop the letter in the mail and wait.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And wait …</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And wait …</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">My package FINALLY arrived last week, and I’ve been testing almost every day since. So, you should have guessed from the headline what it is I was waiting for. But just in case you haven’t gotten it yet .. My new <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/">sex toys</a> for review are a set of those “loveballs”. I searched through all of the balls that Eden Fantasys can offer. And even for me with my latex allergy they have quite a few options. Finally I settled on a pair of <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/crystal-balls/adult-toys-dvds-25441">Crystal Balls</a>. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Why did I chose these? Well, one reason is quite simple. They got the best reviews. I love the fact that there are reviews for the products at Eden Fantasys, it makes it a lot easier to choose when there’s a lot to choose from. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The other things that made me choose them is that since they’re glass, they’re also easy to clean. They come in this cute little heartshaped box, which is ideal for storage. I did own a set of plasic balls years ago, and stored them in a plastic bag. So I liked the idea of the box. It’s metal too, so I don’t have to worry about it breaking anytime soon :)</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Last but not least … They’re so darned cute! Little pink hearts inside clear crystal balls. The box is cute too. A pink heart, need I say more? </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So, why did I ask to get these? Because this time I actually made a request to be able to test out this specific product. As I mentioned before, I have owned a set of love balls before. A big, chunky pair of plastic balls with a string on the end. Didn’t like the string, they were too big for me and they made a lot of noise.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I had those for the same reason that I asked for these.They're good <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/exercisers-for-vaginal-muscles/sex-toy-952">kegel exercisers</a>. Let’s face it. I’m nearing the magic fourties and I have to, you know, maintain things down there. Since I utterly and completely suck at remembering to do my kegels I wanted to try out balls again. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I didn’t expect orgasms or wonderful sensations. I’ve tried things like that before, and you know those eggs that everybody are so fond of? They only tickle … So, no, not expecting multiple orgasms while doing housework.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So, the review. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I like the size. At first I thought they looked small, but it turns out they’re just the perfect size for me. The fact that they’re not hollow makes them silent. Which is good, since I wore them at a cleaning job the other day *grins*</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Also, as I mentioned. They’re easy to clean. A bit of hot water and some soap, followed by some antibacterial stuff does the trick. They’re slippery little bastards though, so take care not to drop them in the sink. Chances are you’ll either drop chip them, or the sink.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I’ve dropped them … on the floor, in the sink and .. in the toilet, which is why I found that antibacterial stuff in the first place. So, hot tip! Do not try to insert them while sitting there. I’ve found that having a towel on the floor is handy in case of accidents.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The only harm from being dropped a lot is that if I look really closely, I’ll find a tiny scratch on one of the balls.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">As I told you before, no orgasms. I know some people get them, but I don’t. It is a pleasant feeling though, even though most time I don’t even notice them being in there. I get kinda horny, and very wet. So I’ve found that wearing panties is a good thing. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I also wore panties because I was worried they might drop out. Well, they didn’t. Except almost one time when I sneezed. I also took very good care when I went to the toilet, because when I did those babies really didn’t want to stay in there. It may be a good idea to take them out, and then pop them back in when you’re done.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So, if you have that No Panties rule. You might want to ask for an exception if you’re told to wear them for a while.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">After 2-3 hours I felt my muscles getting tired, so it’s apparent that they have to work more than usual. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">As for the result? Well, it’s a bit too early to tell. In the meantime I suggest you try them out yourself. They’re worth the money and all us girls need to do our kegels on a regular basis ;)</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-48232992821370916762011-09-10T19:39:00.004+02:002011-09-10T19:39:56.317+02:00Messaging<span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-text-decorations-in-effect: none; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; color: black; font: small "Times New Roman"; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px;"> <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlB0CJ96eLi_nl0n45G4TOGhmVCYxAoIJiWOJdwZDTSckY3RTNDrD2sOus_kY97hgbNVbkA-2oBubENETTa9ZE_GXlcNBLHT9omgsauZcDmFx5ckIHoIyiCbq39qFHF6FrGoXtOeA0PT8/s1600/Making-Emails-Inbox-More-Spaces-Using-Courteous_Iy_.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="170" nba="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlB0CJ96eLi_nl0n45G4TOGhmVCYxAoIJiWOJdwZDTSckY3RTNDrD2sOus_kY97hgbNVbkA-2oBubENETTa9ZE_GXlcNBLHT9omgsauZcDmFx5ckIHoIyiCbq39qFHF6FrGoXtOeA0PT8/s200/Making-Emails-Inbox-More-Spaces-Using-Courteous_Iy_.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
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<span id="internal-source-marker_0.5034505156800151" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span> </div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-text-decorations-in-effect: none; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; color: black; font: small "Times New Roman"; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px;"><span id="internal-source-marker_0.5034505156800151" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">As a woman, with a profile on a couple of BDSM-sites, I get the occasional message from unknown men. Unless they’re rude I try to answer. Sadly, too many messages seem to follow “The Secret Guide to Messaging Submissive Sluts”. Want a tip? It doesn’t work!</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You’ll be amazed at how much alike some of those conversations turn out to be. Why can’t you just be yourself FIRST, and then let your inner D’type out if we manage to have a decent conversation?</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Calling me little one, slut etc. does NOT have a good effect on me. You may have seen friends call me little one in my statuses of FetLife. Thing is, they’re my FRIENDS. So they’ve managed to get inside of the comfort zone where it’s safe to call me that.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Slut? Don’t even go there … My Dom gets to call me that. Noone else. </span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Giving me orders is a good way to piss me off. Sometimes I’ll answer, letting you know that you’re not in a position where I’ll let you do that. Most times I’ll just hit delete and forget about you.</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Being mysterious .. That just makes me wanna bang my head in the desk. What makes you think you’re so interesting that I’ll start digging away when it’s rather obvious that you don’t want to share?</span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Here’s MY “Secret Guide to Messaging Submissive WOMEN”</span></span></span></div>
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<ol>
<li style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; list-style-type: decimal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Face it, you don’t know her. It’s way to early to be familiar in pm no.1, 2, 3 etc</span></li>
<li style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; list-style-type: decimal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Remember she’s a person first, and a submissive second, third or even last for that matter</span></li>
<li style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; list-style-type: decimal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Remember that YOU’RE a person first, and a Dominant second, third or even last for that matter</span></li>
<li style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; list-style-type: decimal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Do not try to order her around until you’re really sure that she’ll accept it. With most women that means, NOT in the first 10 messages. Atleast.</span></li>
<li style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; list-style-type: decimal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Be yourself. Ok, so telling her that you’re gonna walk the dog, go to the store or clean the house is neither sexy nor mysterious. But it’s your life. <br class="kix-line-break" />Don’t overshare either, that’s just awkward. Try to find a middle road. You probably manage that in your every day life. It’s no different “in here”<br class="kix-line-break" /><br class="kix-line-break" />So, main tips:</span></li>
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<br /><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Think … Be polite … Be patient … Be yourself</span></div>
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</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-42066675449048085122011-08-21T19:16:00.001+02:002011-08-21T19:21:34.062+02:00That firm grip ...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2K3wts9L4pobEJ1jViU9qis927glYKCvACfSvl7Os-4bXs3l0l8u7qQCP226oNIvIr9cUOo0rSYWfZHNFoeATNpfD92ysnGEswdHX-CS7cxs4FHxBbbzXQRQ_KmwEzyvQ5sBZ3NaWIuw/s1600/tumblr_ljhpbw0l771qc38zjo1_500_large.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2K3wts9L4pobEJ1jViU9qis927glYKCvACfSvl7Os-4bXs3l0l8u7qQCP226oNIvIr9cUOo0rSYWfZHNFoeATNpfD92ysnGEswdHX-CS7cxs4FHxBbbzXQRQ_KmwEzyvQ5sBZ3NaWIuw/s320/tumblr_ljhpbw0l771qc38zjo1_500_large.jpg" width="240" /></a></div><div style="background-color: transparent;"><span id="internal-source-marker_0.39969505462795496" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br />
</span></div><div style="background-color: transparent;"><span id="internal-source-marker_0.39969505462795496" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br />
</span></div><div style="background-color: transparent;"><span id="internal-source-marker_0.39969505462795496" style="background-color: transparent; color: #444444; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">When I speak with my fellow female sub friends it seems that despite all our differences, one thing seems to be (almost) universal. Our affinity for that firm grip in the neck …</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #444444; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #444444; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">That sensation when a strong hand gets a good grip on the hair in the back of your neck, or the neck itself … It seems I’m not the only one feeling that way.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #444444; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #444444; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">If a Dom I respect does that it gives me the tingles, I get a bit weak in the knees and it’s a really nice feeling. Teasing is almost guaranteed to follow, as it’s apparent that it has quite an effect on me. Blushing is mandatory ofcourse.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #444444; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #444444; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">If the RIGHT person does that … Well.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #444444; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">My breathing gets heavy, my eyes go unfocused, my knees get wobbly, I get that tingling warm sensation in my belly. More often than not I’ll be unable to speak, but be reduced to a helpless whimper. And all my willpower will just drain away …</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #444444; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #444444; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So, this must be something ALL Dominants must love right? After all, it takes little or no effort. You can do it in public. It doesn’t involve neither sex nor nudity, so it can be done even though you’re not in a relationship.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #444444; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #444444; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But there actually seems to be a lot of Dominants that don’t use it. They don’t like it. Or they forget.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #444444; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Isn’t that kinda like saying that you skip foreplay because you don’t like it? Or forget?</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #444444; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #444444; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Oh, that’s right … a lot of you guys skip that part aswell. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #444444; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Never mind that you miss out on a sub that goes instantly weak and willing. Or a woman who writhes and moans in pure pleasure and orgasms … Not to mention the gratitude you’re missing out on …</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #444444; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So just keep on skipping those steps if it’s too much of a hassle. We’ll just move on and find someone else to have fun with.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #444444; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #444444; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">To all of you other guys. Yes, i haven’t forgotten about you. To those of you who remember that firm grip in the neck, foreplay, kissing and all those wonderful things that may seem small. But is oh so significant ...</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #444444; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">Thank you and keep up the good work</span></span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><i>*grins widely*</i></span></span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-21295324829779759142011-08-11T15:18:00.000+02:002011-08-11T15:18:23.385+02:00<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEfSF0iBCKRS3wx-vmaXBpSlxRqlmMAyKoEsLQZtK_AasViC74xvXlAKQprobuLU3mkzgHcdRbkPE8GgDtwjWzFIPiBgHifBbY3POpTXKTUC55iksX8sUTCAm5jIxFEnIGbI2m7ArrUSE/s1600/z221096553_large.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="203" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEfSF0iBCKRS3wx-vmaXBpSlxRqlmMAyKoEsLQZtK_AasViC74xvXlAKQprobuLU3mkzgHcdRbkPE8GgDtwjWzFIPiBgHifBbY3POpTXKTUC55iksX8sUTCAm5jIxFEnIGbI2m7ArrUSE/s320/z221096553_large.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><h1><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small; font-weight: normal;"><br />
</span></h1><h1><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small; font-weight: normal;">So, it's been quiet from me for a while. I've been busy with my summer vacation. And I've had long visits from a couple of my wonderful, kinky friends. For those of you who hope for a juicy story now ... I'm sorry. Although my friends are kinky, their visit was very un-kinky. Girls just aren't my thing.</span></h1><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">I'm getting used to my single, celibate life now. Offers from various men doesn't even tempt me. I want that special someone. And right now, today, I feel that it's ok to wait. I may change my mind tomorrow though. I've learned not to be too set in what I feel and think. M taught me that. If he hadn't been able to talk me into playing with him I would have missed out on some pretty wonderful and exciting months.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">That being said, some innocent fun with friends online and on munches doesn't really count as the kind of play I only want to have with whomever it is I end up with. It's just for fun.<br />
The kind of play I want to avoid is the more intimate kind. Or, the things that feels intimate for me. <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">That includes: Anything involving nudity. My breasts and genitals. Stay awaaay! Flogging, whipping and caning. Hey, I'm a masochist remember? That does get personal. Also, anything that sends me into subspace. That happens kind of quickly sometimes, so I'll just have to decide on that if I end up in a situation where that might happen.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">While I'm talking about M. This blog started because I was playing with him. Without all those reports it feels a bit empty. So I've decided I'll rewrite some of my old posts, edit out the most sexually explicit details. I'll repost them one by one as they get done.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">And uhm , those short stories I promised you? They're still in the making. I haven't done much writing this summer. They will come though.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">Until next time. Take care and enjoy the sun :)<o:p></o:p></span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-47202986018272496092011-07-24T15:21:00.000+02:002011-07-24T15:21:39.037+02:00Beautiful glass ...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSkQbcyC7pXOzb4aRErrMM__D0a1aa4ht6XouY2_J3i3lGdu-NqEeHQd4_Q7eT75ZOAzn6sab1Uz4_QVajy7GyfRveZHDWNvc1R8LdtNToAoLFeBU2pYHouEO7fKoxaCT56mExuemd_KY/s1600/amethyst.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSkQbcyC7pXOzb4aRErrMM__D0a1aa4ht6XouY2_J3i3lGdu-NqEeHQd4_Q7eT75ZOAzn6sab1Uz4_QVajy7GyfRveZHDWNvc1R8LdtNToAoLFeBU2pYHouEO7fKoxaCT56mExuemd_KY/s320/amethyst.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal">A few days ago I got a new addition to my collection of <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/">sex toys</a> from the wonderful people at Eden Fantasys. I was rather curious about this one, since I didn't choose it myself. Kayla, my contact a Eden Toys recommended it since my last g-spot toy turned out to be a bit too big for me.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">The toy I received is the <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/dildos/classic-dildos-and-dongs/amethyst">Amethyst</a> glass dildo, and was selected from the vide variety of <a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/dildos/classic-dildos-and-dongs">dildos</a> that Eden Fantasys offer. <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">This one is, as I mentioned above, made of glass. It's blue and absolutely beautiful. It almost looks like a piece of art, something that you could keep on your shelf for everyone to see. There's no sharp edges, no flaws, no weaknesses in the glass. It's a small piece of perfection.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">It's a "double end dildo". So it's possible to use it in several ways. Both ends can be used, giving you the possibilty to receive different sensations from the same toy. Also I think both ends could be used for anal play. <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">The slender size makes it easy to insert, even if you're a bit tight as I am. The smoothness lessens the need for lubricants for many. If you still prefer to use a lubricant I imagine it will prove very effective.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">Since the material is glass you have an excellent opportunity to desinfect it in ways that you cannot use on regular toys without the risk of ruining them. So if you like to share your toys, this is certainly a choice to consider.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">Needless to say ... this is a waterproof toy. You can use it both in the shower and the bathtub. Be aware however, that glass gets slippery when wet, so make sure you don't drop it.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">It comes in a red velvet bag. Giving it an even more luxurious feel than it already has. The bag isn't thick enough to keep it safe should you happen to drop it however, so you might want to consider something else to store it in.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">The other day I was really happy that it was in this bag. When I got it I put it in my bedroom, under my nightstand with my other toys. The next day a friend came to visit, bringing her small dog ...<br />
At one point I realized the dog wasn't in the livingroom. Where was she? Some faint sounds from the bedroom pointed me in the right direction. And there she was, right next to the red velvet bag that she'd dragged out on the floor. "Look what I found" she seemed to say. Wagging her tail and looking happy. <br />
She seemed a bit disappointed when I took it from her and hid it. <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;">Needless to say ... Next week I'm getting a box from my toys.</span><br />
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;"><br />
</span><br />
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<div style="text-align: justify;"><a href="http://www.edenfantasys.com/"><img alt="Sex toys - EdenFantasys adult toys store" border="0" height="400" src="http://cdn1.edenfantasys.com/Images/ef/banner_240x400_5.jpg" title="Sex toys - EdenFantasys adult toys store" width="240" /></a></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3951981833981920646.post-33762562149424592952011-07-07T07:42:00.001+02:002011-08-21T19:19:59.545+02:00Insomnia<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2Vd148yjcL-vmOLjm1IiKGwiyHtI6HMpkzaDlB2EEDEdL6VJGVzSuIPyYzSKMyCcueaoTaQ6KrGV0nxpwOdSk1jIU4cH1OcaRB2a7Abe5Woz3ukg94StmMFgkS9kkUSx5KPWUWTUOCCE/s1600/img-thing.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2Vd148yjcL-vmOLjm1IiKGwiyHtI6HMpkzaDlB2EEDEdL6VJGVzSuIPyYzSKMyCcueaoTaQ6KrGV0nxpwOdSk1jIU4cH1OcaRB2a7Abe5Woz3ukg94StmMFgkS9kkUSx5KPWUWTUOCCE/s1600/img-thing.jpg" /></a></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">So, it's 06.16 in the morning, and I've been awake since 4. I probably shouldn't be writing anything, and certainly shouldn't be communicating with other people in any way until I've had atleast 2 more hours of sleep. So if this turns out to be a rant, and I seem unfair or unpleasant in any other way ... please bear over with me.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">First of all ... and this is most certainly a rant ... I hate my computer! It's painstakingly slow. It takes "lagging" to a new dimension and my version of word keeps asking me to update! I've obviously not installed everything I should have installed ... And I can't find the cd that came with the machine. I guess it should be possible to download something, but I'm just too lazy to do anything but let it annoy me for the moment.<br />
So! Please don't give me lots of well meaning advice. I'm just too lazy right now. When it's annoyed me for long enough I'll call some friend who knows more about this stuff than me and get the help I need ;)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">End of rant ...<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">Next thing I'm thinking about this morning ...<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">Lately (that means after I stopped playing with M) I've been approached by a surprisingly large amount of guys. <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">They all want to play.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">Great huh? Thing is ... I don't want to play without being in love! But ... that's not a problem! According to them ... we can just play without sex! Just for fun. Flogging, bondage, humiliation, facefucking ... Wait, what? Facefucking is sex! Right? It's not like they're Bill fucking Clinton! Guess what! Fucking me to prove to me that I'm a thing, a sexdoll etc ... That's sex too!<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">But, they all seem to expect me to jump at the chance. Apparently I'm both lonely and desperate. Just because I answer that particular person and talk with him. Even seem to hit it off with him ... It doesn't mean that he's the only man in the world who finds me interesting. Neither am I so lonely that I can't wait another month, or five ... to see if I find that one particular man who likes me as something more than a plaything, or a fuckfriend, or .. whatever they may think I am.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">Ok ... so I feel that lonely and desperate every once in a while ... But it always passes. I try not to let it affect my actions and choices.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">It seems like many people who like BDSM only sees it as a game? You play, you enjoy. "That was great! Thanx!" Then you read the paper, or watch tv, laugh and talk or go your separate ways. That's it? No intimacy? Just a good laugh and a thankyou note?<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">I don't mean to offend anyone. I don't say that this is wrong. I wish I could enjoy BDSM that way myself! And I have. It was great when it felt like the right thing for me. In a few months I may feel like that again. Nothing is written in stone.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">It's just that I'm in a place in my life where I'd like to be in a relationship. Maybe even 24/7? I think I'd enjoy that with the right person.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">BDSM to me is very sexual, very intimate. I get horny, so I "need" to get laid after or during play. I need after care in the form of intimacy. Going directly from play-mode to platonic friend-mode. It just doesn't work for me nowadays. Again ... I wish it did. <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">I just want to say one more thing before I go back to bed and try to get some more sleep ...<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">If you think this is about YOU ... DON'T!<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">This is about noone in particular. <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">I'm not attacking or condemning anyone. <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">It's just random thoughts under the influence of insomnia. Thoughts about what's right for ME. Remember that MY bdsm in no way has to resemble YOUR bdsm. We're all individuals, and one of the wonderful things about this "world" of kinksters and pervs is that there's room for people to be just that ... individuals.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">I've been thinking about this on and off for a couple of years now. The odds for me knowing you for that long are extremely low. So it's not about YOU. There's no reason for anyone to feel hurt, or criticized. I promise you, I have noone in mind. <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">It's about ME<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">It's now 07.30 in the morning. I went to bed at midnight. It took "forever" to go to sleep. I've been awake since 4.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">Think I'll try going back to bed. Luckily I can sleep until 10.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;">Good night!</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0